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Well, if you’re reading this, you fell into the same cave that I did, which makes you a noob, like I was. But, thanks to good old Steve, there’s still hope for you. All you have to do is keep reading, and you’ll be out of this death trap in no time. So, what are you waiting for? Quit reading this paragraph ‘o’ prologue and start surviving!
If you haven’t realized this already, you’re not dead. You should be, but you’re not. The reason for that is that you’ve fallen into a pretty soft cave. Look underneath you. The floor is made of dirt, right? So, punch some dirt! It may sound useless, but don’t worry, I have a plan.
Great, you’ve got a stack of dirt, and some pretty mad punching skills. Now, find a spot in the cave where you can look straight up and see daylight. Once that’s done, jump and place a block of dirt under you. Keep repeating this process until you get up to the top. Oh, by the way, you might find some zombies along the way, but you should be able to run past them.
Well, you got captured. Great. Okay so from what I know about Illuminati (what, didn’t you know that all zombies work for Illuminati?) you’re probably in a cage right now, you know iron bars and stuff. Luckily, Illuminati’s hackers aren’t that great at Minecraft, and they forgot about reinforcing the cage with some bedrock. So, punch the bars. See? That wasn’t too hard. Besides, bloody knuckles are a small price to pay for freedom, right? No? Whatever, just keep running.Now, keep placing blocks under you. Another block. Another block. Another block. Aaaand, freedom! You’re welcome.
Okay, so you avoided the zombies and their Illuminati ways. Keep placing blocks under you, and you’ll be out in no time. ♭Na-na na na-na, I’ll be breakin’ free, now!♭ Another block. Another block. Another block. Freedom! I told you there was still hope!
If you haven’t realized this already, you’re not dead. You should be, but you’re not. The reason for that is that you’ve fallen into a pretty soft cave. Look underneath you. The floor is made of dirt, right? So, punch some dirt! It may sound useless, but don’t worry, I have a plan.
Great, you’ve got a stack of dirt, and some pretty mad punching skills. Now, find a spot in the cave where you can look straight up and see daylight. Once that’s done, jump and place a block of dirt under you. Keep repeating this process until you get up to the top. Oh, by the way, you might find some zombies along the way, but you should be able to run past them.
IF THE ZOMBIES KNOCK YOU OUT AND BRING YOU TO THEIR EVIL MASTER, GO TO THE SECTION LABELED “ZOMBIE ATTACK.” IF YOU AVOIDED THE ZOMBIES GO TO THE SECTION LABELED “SCREW THE ZOMBIES.”
ZOMBIE ATTACK
Well, you got captured. Great. Okay so from what I know about Illuminati (what, didn’t you know that all zombies work for Illuminati?) you’re probably in a cage right now, you know iron bars and stuff. Luckily, Illuminati’s hackers aren’t that great at Minecraft, and they forgot about reinforcing the cage with some bedrock. So, punch the bars. See? That wasn’t too hard. Besides, bloody knuckles are a small price to pay for freedom, right? No? Whatever, just keep running.Now, keep placing blocks under you. Another block. Another block. Another block. Aaaand, freedom! You’re welcome.
SCREW THE ZOMBIES
Okay, so you avoided the zombies and their Illuminati ways. Keep placing blocks under you, and you’ll be out in no time. ♭Na-na na na-na, I’ll be breakin’ free, now!♭ Another block. Another block. Another block. Freedom! I told you there was still hope!
| Tags |
tools/tracking
3295618
6
a-noobs-guide-to-surviving
savery
Escapazition
PsyChNOdelic
Ender Sparkle
WYHA-Storm
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p.s. i love the SCREW THE ZOMBIES and other funny titles!