My friend and I found ourselves in a spooky scary situation earlier today. I went over to his house, as I usually do, to play some GTA or Castle Crashers, et cetra with him for some laughs. When I arrived he was in his PJ's playing MineCraft Beta 1.4. My friend, though he asked for his real name not to be published, shall be referred to as "The Prophet Jesus" for the length of this article.

'The Prophet Jesus' was making a castle beside a bay in a plains biome. He had gone back to his roots of watching, as to protect his identidy, "Paulsoaresjesus". He had created a small ditch around the castle, with a tiny one-block cobblestone bridge across it. Witihin his "moat" he had created many murder holes. Unfortunately, 'The Prophet Jesus' realised that he wasn't getting attacked by many naturally hostile mobs in his castle. But rather, chickens seemed to breach his walls more often. Some times they would jump down in to the ditch and find their way through the murder holes and in to his house. I laughed at his witty comment and replied 'Oh The Prophet Jesus. You scandal.' before I was abruptly jump-scared by a chicken appearing right in front of us. In the chat a message appeared. "I will get you, The Prophet Jesus!". For security reasons, the chicken's name will be replaced with "The Lord of Darkness, Satan, Himself". "I know where you live!" and then, 'The Lord of Darkness, Satan, Himself' despawned. Oddly enough, whether The Prophet Jesus meant it or not, the number '13' appeared quite often in stacks of blocks and items continuously throughout the rest of the experience. Every night a chicken attacked his home, walking around it as if it were his own, despawning by around sunrise. The small farm he created while I was there protected by a scarecrow, that, due to his insecurity, shall be referred to as "The Pope", was often trampled by nearby chickens. So far 13 blocks have been trampled. 

This has been my story, and also that of The Prophet Jesus and his struggle with The Lord of Darkness, Satan, Himself, only aided by The Pope and Paulsoaresjesus. The Prophet Jesus is unfortunately allergic towards chickens, so he is afraid to attack them. I will question him tomorrow, and see if we can get an interview with The Lord of Darkness, Satan, Himself (the chicken). We will try our best to answer as many comments as possible in the interview, and thank you for reading. Have a good day, and don't fall for the lies of the chickens! 

Also, for any skeptics, this is not a "troll" or joke. This is a real MLG experience. Do not attempt to recreate any of the stunts performed on this programme. (The seed is "YAMAN" for any edgy peeps out there. But you must play on version 1.4 of Beta MineCraft.)

Yours sincerely,
                              (For the protection of his name) Paco.