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A whole new world- Minecraft short story/ pt 1

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CrazyPigglet's Avatar CrazyPigglet
Retired Moderator
Level 49 : Master Unicorn
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Steve was walking on the muddy road up to the hill. He was thinking of the day he left home. Of the day he left his cows, and sheep, and his poor mother all alone in that empty shack. He sometimes felt guilt. He would sometimes feel that he needs to turn back. But no. He started this journey with one goal and one goal only. To see the world. To travel. To meet people (that weren’t his mother). So he would be happy again. When he reached the top of the hill, he was stunned. His jaw dropped, and his eyes were wide open.  Most beautiful valley, surrounded by mountainside, with a waterfall that created a rainbow as it went down into the river, that separated everything in half. A village was spread over the fields of green grass, with wooden bridge across the river. Then, the most amazing thing happened. Sun was setting behind the mountains, coloring the sky in shades of pink and red, reflecting from the clouds and painting the river in most beautiful colors. Slowly, candles started lighting up in front of wooden houses. Happy children rushing to their homes for dinner. Steve realized he would have to hurry down if he wanted to find a tavern before night. Then, a strange old man called for him. "Hey there, you youngster! Whatcha doin’ this late all the way up here?"



Next thing he knew, he was sitting at dinning table, eating some chicken soup. The old man, named Ben, offered him a bed to sleep in. At first, Steve didn’t know why. But they talked, and Steve realized. "Since my wife passed away, I’ve been quite lonely… It’s only me and Wolf." Wolf was his dog, big and grey, with terrifying  gaze in its eyes. "I haven’t had company in a while. It’s nice to talk to humans, from time to time, but I rarely go down to the village. I mostly grow my own food." The water started to boil in the fireplace. Ben poured them some tea. They chatted as they drank it, and later, they went to bed. It wasn’t a big house, so they shared a bedroom. "At least I have a bed to sleep in", thought Steve. He fell asleep, even though the bed was quite uncomfortable. Hay was sticking out from everywhere, poking him in the back. A hard knocking, that Wolf barking woke him up. "Stay down", whispered Ben, as he passed by Steve carrying a lantern. "What is it?" asked Steve quietly. But Ben didn’t hear him. He had already left. He heard some loud noises, so he had to get up. But as he entered the room, he was thrown back by an explosion. "What is that!?" screamed Steve in terror. Ben crawled back in to the room, covered in blood. Steve saw he was in pain.  He helped Ben up, and carried him to the bed. Ben was missing a finger. Wolf came into the room, also hurt. He was carrying some kind of rotten flesh in his mouth. "What was that?" wondered Steve. "Sit down my boy, you have a lot to learn."



Then next morning, Steve was sitting at the table in shock. He couldn’t believe what he just heard. "So, they were zombies, and watch-a-call them.. creepsters…? And those stuff really exist?! " "That’s right, my boy… they haunt us in the long nights. There are also gigantic spiders, witches and nasty slimes. As well as skeletons. You don’t want to mess with ‘em! Their arrows are nasty" explained Ben. He wrapped a bandage around his hand. His index finger was blown off, but he was still working hard on something. There’s a whole new world out there, and Steve didn’t know about it. He was thinking about all the mysteries he still needs to discover about this new world, when a loud noise distracted him. Ben was hitting something with a big, metal hammer. "What are you doing?"asked Steve. "Well this is my crafting table", replied Ben,"what do you think I’m doin’?" Then he took the metal object he was hitting, and put it in the cauldron. "There," he said, "all done!" He walked up to Steve and gave him a sword. "Why am I going to need this?" asked Steve. "Well," started Ben with quiet voice, "if you want to survive, you’ll need one. Now, let’s go out and have some fun!"


They went out to the field in front of the cottage. The sky was blue and sun was shining. "Now", said Ben,"attack me!"  "What?!" replied Steve. "Attack me!" Ben yelled. Steve was confused, but he did as Ben told him. He grabbed the sword in both hands, and started charging at Ben. He swinged his sword, just as Ben moved to the side, letting Steve fall down. "Is that the best you can do?!" Ben was angry. Steve stood up and cleaned himself. He wanted to catch Ben off guard. As he was cleaning his pants, he quickly grabbed his sword and swinged it at Ben. Ben, again, moved to the side, now pushing Steve and making him fall. Then, he put his sword on Steve’s throat."If that is the best you can do, you are doomed",said Ben with disappointment in his voice,"Tell you what. There’s only one way to test man’s strength. We go out into the woods, in the nighttime. If you can survive, you can stay with me. If not, you are useless and I ain’t need you no more!" Steve almost felt like crying. He stood up. Started cleaning himself, and tried to look tough. "Fine by me" said Steve, holding up his tears. Ben smiled, and he looked like he already knew that Steve was going to fail."Fine by me" answered Ben, as he went into the house. This was Steve’s only chance in this new world. Live or die? He knew the answer. The only answer. Survive. 
CreditThanks NovaSkin for awesome banner
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1
05/03/2015 3:41 pm
Level 33 : Artisan Explorer
NitroStarman
NitroStarman's Avatar
Interesting! Great story! :)
Omg! It's the MC version of Ben Kenobi!
Omg! Steve was a mama's boy! Who knew? XD
1
02/23/2015 9:31 pm
Level 3 : Apprentice Scribe
Mail Order Cowboy
Mail Order Cowboy's Avatar
Lack of quote marks ("...") around dialouge and large walls of text kept me from reading this. The line "Feel free to leave a comment, or maybe a diamond?" from the start was also discouraging. Your readers know that they can 'Like' and 'diamond', you don't need to remind them; it just makes your begging for popularity more obvious.
1
02/24/2015 10:15 am
Level 49 : Master Unicorn
CrazyPigglet
CrazyPigglet's Avatar
Thank you for your suggestion. I removed the first line. To keep the text more "clean", I used dashes (-) instead of quote marks. Beliieve me, there are lot of conversations :)
1
02/24/2015 1:19 pm
Level 3 : Apprentice Scribe
Mail Order Cowboy
Mail Order Cowboy's Avatar
"–Now, said Ben, attack me! –What?! replied Steve. –Attack me! Ben yelled."  

In no way is that more clean than using quote marks. With you (incorrect) style, there is no way of knowing when a character stops speaking. This makes your blog almost impossible to understand, and should be corrected both here, and on future blogs.
1
02/25/2015 7:04 am
Level 49 : Master Unicorn
CrazyPigglet
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Ok. Will use quotemarks in the future.
1
02/23/2015 2:36 pm
Level 5 : Apprentice Crafter
TetSays
TetSays's Avatar
Nice story!
1
02/23/2015 2:40 pm
Level 49 : Master Unicorn
CrazyPigglet
CrazyPigglet's Avatar
Thanks! More comming soon!
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