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Eli Presents: The Chiaroscuro Collection! [Season 3 Edition!]

Chia Eli, The Blogger That Grows!

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avatar Peridot XJ9
Level 37 : Artisan Professor
Chiapet GIF - Chiapet Chia GIFs
Oh hi, guys! It's me, Eli, back with yet another blog for you guys to read once more! Before I begin, I just wanted to get something off my chest: I joined Chiaroscuro's Contest
yet again, but it's the season 3 edition.

"But Eli!" I hear that darn obnoxious Magikarp yelling again. "Why do you keep selling yourself out to these blog contests!? Shouldn't you just stick to your own thing and not have the creativity sucked out of you from the restrictions they give? And why the heck is this a "collection" blog!? Use the gosh dang collection feature if you want to wrap all of your blogs onto one place! The creative blogs must rise!" Woah, there! Calm yourself, Magikarp #1,296. The reason why I'm joining this contest again is because I want to improve myself with these blogs. Back then, my blogs weren't really that special. They had blinding fonts and had never really settled on a formula until "Why Humans are Magikarps" came along. Heck, if it wasn't for these contests and other caring people, my style wouldn't be able to branch out that much and just be a caps-filled egotistical (Yeah, I sometimes acted a bit "superior" in my older blogs) blinding mess.
Mainstream again Considers self a sellout.  - Mainstream again Considers self a sellout.   Hipster Barista
After failing miserably in Round 2 of Season 2 with my "worst" blog ever to date, "Cool Dragons," I decided to learn from my mistakes and come back faster and stronger than before. This season, I decided to experiment a little and bundle all of my Chiaroscuro
entries into one big blog. Sure, it's a little different, but I'm only doing this so that it won't interfere with my personal blogs and I'll be able to write everything in here at my own pace. Plus, I won't have to put intros and memes (for my casual dolphins and awesome people that don't like reading contest entries) at the end of every single gosh dang entry I'd create. It will even have an updating status bar that will show if I'm able to move onto the next story/round or not! For now, let's not dilly-dally and get to these stories!

Round 1: "Everyday"
Word Count: 861 Words! (Wow, this is the shortest story I've ever done.)
Text Color: Gray
Status: Submitted!

"Beep beep beep!" A strange noise seemed to wake up the sleeping man that laid on his black and white striped bed. His hair was quite messy, probably because of the tossing and turning he pulled off in his bed last night. He wore the brightest of blue pajamas that covered his body like clouds would to the sky. He appeared to be snoozing and driveling out lots of saliva from his mouth, since he always slept with his mouth open. With a bored look on his face, he tossed himself over to the still-beeping alarm clock and slammed it with his right hand. In the alarm clock's brown wooden domain, there was a white lamp and a dusty old golden ring that lied next to it. The gold item had purpose before, but for some reason, it was still kept on the table. He thought of throwing it out once, but something in his mind wanted him to keep it, so there it lied. With a quick annoyed snore, the tired man prepared himself to sit on the edge of his bed to get himself up for a brand new day. His physique was tall yet average for a man his age and could tower over most women who approached him. Despite his tallness, however, he never had the chance to fall in love with someone ever again. He walked over to his dressing room to gather some clothing of his choice, which turned out to be some navy blue jeans and a plain white shirt. Accessory-wise, he got himself a crimson red necktie that struck fear to anyone who had no job. Once he was done, he walked over to the brown closet filled with clothes and grabbed himself a black business suit with a red and white nametag that said, "Hi! My name is Bob" on it. Yes, if you didn't read the title already, this guy's name is Bob.

After he secretly dawned on his chosen clothes in the bathroom, Bob proceeded to brush his teeth with the mintiest of toothpaste on a regular red toothbrush, top and bottom all around with the soft end of the brush in his mouth. Once he spat the remains of his already-used toothpaste into the small oval-shaped sink, he turned on the cold water using a handle on the right side of the sink. It flowed and flowed into the drain like rain that fell down from the sky. Bob decided to rinse all the remaining germs out by collecting the water that fell from the sink into his mouth, tossing it around to different parts inside his cheeks before gargling and giving the infected water a hard spit into the oval-shaped portal to the sewers, never to return into his life again. After rinsing out of what remained in that germ-filled sink of his, he continued to keep the door closed just so he could privately go to the bathroom in his toilet. These details aren't going to be shared because... Well... It's just too gross. No. Just no.

Now that Bob was ready to start his day, he opened the door to his apartment as he carried a suitcase down the grime-ridden hallway. Sounds of people and pets yapping behind their rooms plunged the ears of those who walked by them. Once he got to the end of the hallway, he noticed an elevator and pushed a bright orange button on the right side of the door's wall to summon it's service. All of a sudden, the grey doors slowly opened as he went in un-fazed, pressing a button that had a "G" on it before they closed up again. A slight force pushed down on Bob's body as the elevator went down. Third floor, Second floor, First floor, ground floor...

"Ding!" A light bell noise rang as the downward force was alleviated from his shoulders. When the shiny silver doors opened up, a smack of New York's sunlight and morning atmosphere had already hit him. People walked along the sidewalks, presumably having much better more exciting lives than him. Some were running their own food stands out in the blazing yet cold sunlight of September. Others were performers dancing around on the streets trying to get a few good couple bucks off of people. Bob's apartment was squeezed in with varying lower-sized houses, while others of varying colors and brick-types rivaled from the other side. After appreciating the urban surroundings of his home, he proceeded to look on the sidewalks for his car, which shone a glossy yet somewhat grimed-up dark blue color and had a silver Honda logo placed on top of a bumper sticker which said "BOR-1NG" on it. He got right into the car and started driving to his workplace. As he was getting there, however, he noticed all the people around him having fun their significant others. They acted playful and smiled like they didn't have a care in the world. That's when Bob realized: His life used to be like this. His life used to have different colors, but now, it's all grey like everyone else's lives. Now, he felt so...


Round 2: "Who Knows!"
"I Never Win Anything, Okay!?"
Round 3: "If I Ever Get There..."
"I Never Win Anything, Okay!?"
Round 4: "I'm Not Going to Make It This Far!"
"I Never Win Anything, Okay!?"
Status of Contest:
"All Around Me Are Familiar Faces... Warn Out Places... Warn Out-"

Big Red Dog | CHI CHI CHI CHIA | image tagged in big red dog | made w/ Imgflip meme maker
So, did you guys like them at all? ...What!? You say these stories are awful and you don't want me to make it into the next round because I'm a disgrace to descriptive storytelling!?

Well, even if I do happen to lose on the first round (or second yet again!), it's alright! I'll just come back again faster and stronger than before. After all, this is why I join contests like this in the first place. To strive for the top and be the best blogger I can be. Sometimes, I may lose and produce something I'll regret, but that's okay. We learn from our mistakes, and when I look back on them, I smile, because it pushed me to get me to where I am today. Depending on when you're reading this, the 200th blog spectacular will come out soon, and until then, keep on doing what you love and make sure to live life the porpoiseful way! Peace!
hair wtf chia pet tune id - 7035122176
Chia Pet Memes
dogs Chia Pet IRL pun hedge fund chihuahua - 6658842880
WATCH IT GROW! hia Pet HANDMADE DECORATIVE PLANTER EASY TO DO... FUN TO GROW! Contains: Handmade pottery planter FULL COAT 1-2 WEEKS JE . Chia seed packet for 3 plantings -Convenient plastic drip tray e Planting and care instruction sheet FLUFFLE PUFF
THE ORIGINAL CHIA PET | image tagged in chia richie | made w/ Imgflip meme maker
turtle chia pet by YO-spoon-leg
Cheezburger Image 2775426304
what if beards were really chia pets? - what if beards were really chia pets?  conspiracy keanu
CreditShoutout to Chiaroscuro for hosting such an awesome ingenious contest that continues to grow strong to this day!

1 Update Logs

Did I Make It to Round Two? : 01/11/2019 5:21:38 pmJan 11th

Well, here's your short answer:

I'm a disgrace to the blogging community. ;~;

Comments : 10

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1 - 10 of 10

lets hope you move on
  • Peridot XJ9
  • Level 37
  • Artisan Professor
  • January 9, 2019, 12:37 am
From what? These contests? Or to the next round?
to the next round ofc c:
  • Peridot XJ9
  • Level 37
  • Artisan Professor
  • January 10, 2019, 6:42 pm
Aww, thanks Theoden! That really means a lot, considering the somewhat true fact that I always lose in contests like these... :P
  • Chiaroscuro
  • Level 51
  • Grandmaster Ladybug
  • December 17, 2018, 1:02 am
Bonus points for chia pet throwback. Shame kids these days never got to experience the craze.
  • Peridot XJ9
  • Level 37
  • Artisan Professor
  • December 17, 2018, 5:54 pm
Yeah, like what happened to Chia pets, anyways? Did they die into obscurity or did they just get discontinued like some other products that are normally seen on TV? :P
  • Chiaroscuro
  • Level 51
  • Grandmaster Ladybug
  • December 17, 2018, 6:33 pm
They're still around, believe it or not! Though never again will the kids get to hear the trademark ch-ch-ch-chia of days gone by.
  • Peridot XJ9
  • Level 37
  • Artisan Professor
  • December 17, 2018, 8:06 pm
Cool, but it really sucks that they got rid of that catchy jingle for newer commercials! That's what made me remember these glorified potted plants in the first place. xP
  • DarienGaming
  • Level 13
  • Journeyman Artist
  • December 16, 2018, 8:54 pm
  • Peridot XJ9
  • Level 37
  • Artisan Professor
  • December 17, 2018, 5:53 pm
Thank you so much! I'm glad you liked this blog "collection!" :D

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