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Red like Moonstone.

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Pigman Defense Attorney avatar Pigman Defense Attorney
Level 32 : Artisan Button Pusher
Ice cream really is better up here.

I look down, or forward in my case, to see my home floating far above the horizon. It's really weird to see Earth from the moon, but the view is incredible. It's probably mid-afternoon in Piggenstein right now, but who's keeping track?
chickenpants93 is still picking out his flavor, which is understandable since there are so many of them, but we aren't actually here for the ice cream.

"alright, I'll take your 'potato stalk'." said a voice behi- wait, potato stalk?

I turn around to see chickenpants receive his poisonous ice cream.
"I thought for sure those were bad for you, but you wouldn't actually put poison in your food right?"

I start to panic. "Erm, Chickenpants!?"

The scooper looks insulted "This ice cream contains nightshade, the most nutritious ingredient in the potato flower. Whoever told you that potato stalks were poisonous lied."

"Pfft. Ok man, whatever you-"


Now chickenpants looked annoyed. "what is it now!?"

"Why would you get the one poisonous item on the list?"

"You do realize that cyanide is one of the flavors, right? Seriously, they probably aren't using real poison."

The scooper gasps in disgust. "I'll have you know that cyanide is actually very good for your stomach!"

Chickenpants turns to the scooper with a worried look on his face. "you aren't serious are you?"

"Why would I lie?"

"Ok Pigman, I see your point." Chickenpants hands back the cone. "Thank you for the ice cream but I'll stick with 'potato root' for now."

The scooper lets out a sigh and rolls his eyes. "Whatever. You earth creatures are so annoying to deal with."

Moonites are weird.

Anyway, now that we have our ice cream we can start heading to the light border. Nobody really goes to the dark side of the moon; this makes sense, of course, but it would be nice to know more about it.

"Alright," says chickenpants as he comes up behind me, "now that we've got our ice cream, let's head to the light border. I'll call sans undertaIe and see if he's in place."

This entire heist was planned out perfectly, We have multiple drills that are built to dig right through the moon's crust in multiple areas which should make the separation of the halves go fairly quick. This will only take a few decades.

"What!?" Huh... chickenpants seems upset....

"Wurhveviv?" I'm trying to say 'what is it' but my mouth is full of Ice cream at the moment.

chickenpants lets out a sigh as he hangs up the phone. "Waffledroppings"

"Language." I say after swallowing.

"Come on, lets get too the border." he says as he starts to run toward the darkness.

I work to keep up as I wonder what all of the fuss is about. As we pass the light border we are stepping closer to our goal of....

I look ahead at the gigantic dome of shaded glass; who knows what is beyond? A Neon sign flashes the colors of a familiar country.

Our plan was to steal the dark side of the moon and blame Russia. I guess we wont have to, because Russia got here first.

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02/22/2021 9:46 am
Level 15 : Journeyman Pirate
TowableFern6091 avatar
suddenly I want to be featured in something like this
02/21/2021 9:45 pm
Level 47 : Master Birb
chickenpants93 avatar
05/29/2020 11:50 pm
Level 63 : High Grandmaster Elf
PersonWhoPlaysMinecraft avatar
this is great xD
05/28/2020 1:54 pm
Level 47 : Master Birb
chickenpants93 avatar
this is literally the best thing ive read in my entire life.
so far its 100% accurate.
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