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How the Web was Won - A Tale of This Planet's Heroes [Part One]

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Happybandaid avatar Happybandaid
Retired Moderator
Level 44 : Master Scribe

In the faint torchlight of Ye Crafty Planet Inn, a man sat in the corner at a rough wooden table, nursing a cool lemonade in his thickly bandaged hands. A wide-brimmed hat shaded the man's face, every inch of which was covered in bandages aside from his eyes and his maniacal smile.

A flurry of wind disturbed the peaceful atmosphere as several youths entered the quiet inn, making faces and loudly blabbering with each other. After a few seconds of this, the bandaged man in the corner stood up from his seat, banging the table and proclaiming with a mad grin,"If you don't quiet down I'll have to quiet you myself!" before settling comfortable back down in his seat.
The startled youngsters quickly sat down in shock and awe. There was something different about this man, they thought. They soon noticed the golden clasp on the man's cloak, gleaming brightly though the torchlight was dim.
One of the more daring (or perhaps more stupid) bright-faced youths spoke up and asked the man, "How did you get that golden clasp you're wearing?" The bandaged man's smile widened.
"It's a long story. C'mere, and I'll tell you the tale!" He said, gesturing jubilantly at his table. The youngsters looked at each other, unsure, but a couple of them moved to the mysterious, overly-cheerful stranger's table.
The cheerful Bandaged Man motioned to the waitress, a sassy young girl, to bring him more lemonade, and began his story.

* * *

"It all started back in the Eleventh Autumn of the Second Age. Back then, tales had been told of a fearsome and mighty Troll-Drake roaming the lands, born from the unholy union of a Web Troll and a Flamerspawn Dragon, to rule over all Troll hordes and Flamespawn kind -"
One of the young lads sneezed, spewing food all over the table. "Excuse me, I do that a lot" he said, wiping his nose. The Bandaged Man gave him a sidelong glance and then laughed before continuing his story.
"Great heroes were required to combat this foe. Some of us were requested, others asked. We grabbed our swords, axes, pens, pencils, and other such weapons of deadly force to smite this great danger to the Web Lands of the Five Forums. Our Planet, this Planet which we had crafted and built with our own hands, was in danger from a deadly foe. As the chosen ones we could not allow this foe to reign terror over the hearts of the people of our fair lands." The cheery Bandage Man took a big swig of lemonade.
"Lemonade. A true man's drink. Now, where was I. Ah, right. So, the Great Crimson Ruler of these lands, a mechanical but wise construct left behind by the ancients, granted us these golden clasps. He gave them to us, saying, 'With these, my friends, you may always be known as kind, strong, and generous helpers of the people, committed to stopping the Troll hordes and Flamespawn.' Anyways, we set out for the lair of the beast after we all had gathered. We were few, but strong - an alliance of comrades which could never be broken. Within our ranks were heroes such as Judd the Great, known as a friend to the people, Studs the Punk, a hardened warrior and renowned weapon-smith, and The Lady Carole, a wise sorceress known as the 'Matron of the Land.' There were many other brave souls as well, and each had a great part in this tale, as you will learn..."

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08/09/2012 10:31 pm
Level 24 : Expert Narwhal
rooster_uy avatar
Lol, nice. You have so many subscribers:):):):)
12/09/2011 7:10 pm
Level 63 : High Grandmaster Hero
Jackie1st avatar
Lol very epic
11/26/2011 7:33 pm
Level 24 : Expert Goblin
Fartfingers avatar
Who else got the sneeze7 reference? anyone?
12/03/2011 9:47 am
Level 68 : High Grandmaster Hero
Sneeze7 avatar
oh now i see it XD
12/03/2011 9:46 am
Level 68 : High Grandmaster Hero
Sneeze7 avatar
what about me now?
11/26/2011 10:12 pm
Level 44 : Master Scribe
Happybandaid avatar
I did! I did! :D
11/14/2011 8:04 pm
Level 10 : Journeyman Network
BandwidthSlayer avatar
Im not sure if any dragons attack the internet.
11/14/2011 8:27 pm
Level 44 : Master Scribe
Happybandaid avatar
Well, Trolls and Flamers sure do. ;)

If you combine them...?
11/14/2011 10:18 pm
Level 22 : Expert Ninja
Arzu avatar

-pulls up high pants-, -pushes glasses up so far they imprint into my face-

a troll combined with a flamer would obviously make a "Fire Troll"

not a dragon

-jokes do not take this seriously bandaid-
11/15/2011 12:30 am
Level 44 : Master Scribe
Happybandaid avatar
Hahaha are you trying to mimic my irresistible fashion sense?

And no, (closes eyes, calmy pushes up glasses with index finger as they flash in the light, anime style)

I believe that would actually be a "Flame Troll"

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