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How To Potato [A Tutorial] ۰•●χoχo●•۰

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avatar _books
Level 28 : Expert Ninja
318
Hi there Awesomes, today I am here with a very serious blog on how to potato. We will go through all the steps on how to become a potato in the easiest ways possible. So join me, fellow wanna-be papas, and listen close, because Imma teach you how to potateoses.



What You Need To Potato:


  • 1. Potato Patch
  • 2. Pencil
  • 3. Paper
  • 4. A Family
  • 6. Yourself
  • 7. Seven (7) Goat
  • 8. Two Hundred (200) Potatoes





How To Potato:

  • 1. First, you must quickingley write a letter to your family. Using the pencil and paper, write a loving note about how you must leave to live with your kind, the potatos. Potatoes use terrible grammar and spelling, so you must mimic the ways of the potato
  • 2. Pack yourself 200 potatoes. You will need many popatoe for the seven goats you will bring on youre journey. Than start your way on to a potatoe patch.
  • 3. you must be aware that people will ask where you are going with seven goates and 200- potati. Reply with "I wanna be the very potatoeness. Like no one ever was" and wait for them to walk away. You will be a poatoe and no1 will stop u.
  • 4: rech the pto patch. find middle of patch n sit dere? weight 4 potato to xcept u, u wll kno whn u fell ur skin be hard n ruff, w/o no muscle or bones u will not c here smell or tuch bc u is poto. congfrats ur potsuopo



That's how you potato! And, if you haven't guessed yet, this isn't a serious blog and you cannot become a potato. I decided to jump on the "Fake How-To" bandwagon, perhaps a bit too late? I'm unsure. Anyway, I hope you liked it! Diamond, Favorite, Comment, Subscribe, all of that jazz. If you want to, durr.

Nice chatting about potatisines, Awesomes!

PS: Thanks for the Pop Reel <3

PPS: You guys are all crazy. Thanks for the home page .3.
Tags

1
09/15/2014 6:55 pm
Level 41 : Master Artist
Muta_Moo
How did you know I am obsessed with potatoes.

Are you watching me through my window ;ooooo

Or maybe we're long lost siblings o.O
1
09/15/2014 8:05 pm
Level 28 : Expert Ninja
_books
umg maybe we are long lost siblings .o.

But no, no stalking here.

maybe
1
09/15/2014 8:16 pm
Level 41 : Master Artist
Muta_Moo
-sees person standing outside window-

psh nah there's no way it can be you

-looks closer-

-closes curtains-
1
09/15/2014 8:18 pm
Level 28 : Expert Ninja
_books
geT READY
1
09/15/2014 8:27 pm
Level 41 : Master Artist
Muta_Moo
-grabs all of the potatoes and runs- ;o
1
09/10/2014 7:45 pm
Level 5 : Apprentice Artist
Luna_Lovegood125
(gasp) best evah!
OMG I LOVE POTAATOES <3 <3 <3
1
09/10/2014 7:48 pm
Level 28 : Expert Ninja
_books
yeee
1
08/30/2014 12:50 pm
Level 39 : Artisan Nerd
Kay_Harlow
*sun shines on meh*

YUSS I'M BECOMING DA POTATOE!!!! 

*potato angel come from the heavens and grabs meh*

*turns into potatoe, and lives rest of life in Potatoe Heaven, where potatoes get to roam around and play*

-._-. so emotional right now
1
08/30/2014 12:58 pm
Level 28 : Expert Ninja
_books
cri cri ;3;
1
08/30/2014 1:25 pm
Level 39 : Artisan Nerd
Kay_Harlow
ikr ;w;
1
08/30/2014 6:46 am
Level 41 : Master Mlem Mlem Bat
planetblox2000
The instructions were faulty. I became a cabbage.
1
08/30/2014 9:06 am
Level 28 : Expert Ninja
_books
Seriously so many people turning into cabbages emg
1
08/27/2014 1:40 pm
Level 36 : Artisan Architect
pelagius_septim
I love you.
1
08/27/2014 7:04 pm
Level 28 : Expert Ninja
_books
wow okay thanks <3
1
08/25/2014 2:29 pm
Level 20 : Expert Button Pusher
shaaaaaye
I turned into a girl...
awkward experience
1
08/27/2014 7:04 pm
Level 28 : Expert Ninja
_books
Niccceeee
1
08/25/2014 11:22 am
Level 6 : Apprentice Explorer
Sol-Dios Array
I turned into a giant robot.
Not mad though XD.
1
08/09/2014 9:11 pm
Level 38 : Artisan Bunny
emily10
I WANNA BE A POTATO ... wait.. but.. i don hav 200 potatoes ;-; i will just stick with being a marshmallow den <3
1
08/09/2014 10:19 pm
Level 28 : Expert Ninja
_books
Cool c:

You do you, be the best marshmallow you can be! <3

lmololpotatebbettertho
1
08/09/2014 10:21 pm
Level 38 : Artisan Bunny
emily10
marshmallowsaremoreamazehdenpotatoes huh wat nuthing and tyyy <3
1
08/09/2014 10:37 pm
Level 28 : Expert Ninja
_books
youwannago Hehe, what? Did you hear that? Oh, sorry, it was just the wind. Npp <3
1
08/09/2014 10:43 pm
Level 38 : Artisan Bunny
emily10
heheh  cx
1
08/05/2014 4:35 pm
Level 3 : Apprentice Explorer
Diamond_Creeper522
another way to patato is to sit on the couch and sleep allll day
1
08/06/2014 7:25 am
Level 28 : Expert Ninja
_books
Ye, but then da potato take longer to xcept u

uno
1
08/04/2014 4:51 pm
Level 36 : Artisan Toast
-meme-
i turned into a goat....
1
08/04/2014 6:20 pm
Level 28 : Expert Ninja
_books
Are you sure you used 7 goat and not more? That might be the problem.
1
08/03/2014 4:30 am
Level 19 : Journeyman Unicorn
MelodyBunny
I turned into a smiley face that winks all day...
1
08/04/2014 1:15 am
Level 28 : Expert Ninja
_books
dats still gud
1
07/31/2014 9:53 am
Level 6 : Apprentice Explorer
theninja23
thank you SOOOOO much! i was able to join mr potato and now we are saving the univeres together... wanna know how?!?!??!?!?! by.... SITTING STILL   *DUN DUN DUUUUUN*
1
08/04/2014 1:15 am
Level 28 : Expert Ninja
_books
OMGEEEEE
1
07/30/2014 5:53 pm
Level 41 : Master Artist
Ender_Eely
Instructions not clear enough, got stuck in the air vent.
1
07/31/2014 9:52 am
Level 6 : Apprentice Explorer
theninja23
look on the bright side! you will be cool during summer and warm during winter :D
1
07/31/2014 12:11 am
Level 28 : Expert Ninja
_books
god dangit ender
1
07/30/2014 4:58 pm
Level 13 : Journeyman Network
Knarfer
We have a problem here. I followed all the steps to the letter and I turned into a lamp.

Is there any way to reverse it?
1
07/31/2014 12:11 am
Level 28 : Expert Ninja
_books
Anypotato ever have this happen to them before? Sorry, I'm not sure if it's reversible. But, lamps are pretty rad.
1
07/30/2014 3:57 pm
Level 6 : Apprentice Explorer
theninja23
FINLI! DNT WRY GLADOS! IM ON ME WY!!!!
1
07/31/2014 12:10 am
Level 28 : Expert Ninja
_books
YE
1
07/29/2014 8:03 pm
Level 13 : Journeyman Skinner
james_415
"I wanna be the very potatoeness. like no one ever was"
Gold. It's Just Gold
1
07/29/2014 8:45 pm
Level 28 : Expert Ninja
_books
thank
1
07/29/2014 5:09 pm
Level 49 : Master Cowboy
Star
hi this is me irl

i used to be sasha, now i'm just an ordinary potato
1
07/29/2014 5:15 pm
Level 28 : Expert Ninja
_books
mY GOD


gud jeb c u gais she folowd da rulz
1
07/29/2014 5:17 pm
Level 49 : Master Cowboy
Star
r u all jelli of mai byootiful potatoness
1
07/29/2014 5:33 pm
Level 28 : Expert Ninja
_books
ye
lookie dis potate
1
07/29/2014 4:42 pm
Level 33 : Artisan Geek
Skullduggerycain
I am potatoe. *yells off of cliff* HAHA! YA HEAR THAT, WORLD? I'M THE POTATOE NOW!
1
07/29/2014 4:45 pm
Level 28 : Expert Ninja
_books
yes

evry1 prase new potato lord
1
07/29/2014 2:34 am
Level 27 : Expert Pig
JosephD100
How dare you make jokes about potatoe people! This is outragous, being a potatoe is something youre born with, one does not simply potato in a day! It take fuever to be accepted as a potato,
I know this, i was one of the few, born not a potatoe, but ya know ya gotta live with not being a potato... :(
1
07/29/2014 2:37 am
Level 28 : Expert Ninja
_books
Well I got dis all frum da interwebs so ik its truuuu
1
07/29/2014 1:47 am
Level 41 : Master Pixel Puncher
AtomicCookies
Instructions weren't clear enough, got my potato stuck in my tree. :(
1
07/29/2014 2:31 am
Level 28 : Expert Ninja
_books
Oh no! To fix, get more potato to lure potato out of tree, then restart.
1
07/29/2014 7:05 am
Level 41 : Master Pixel Puncher
AtomicCookies
He's being hesistant and doesn't seem to be coming down anytime soon :(
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