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Who’s Waldo?

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TurtlesMemes avatar TurtlesMemes
Level 24 : Expert Skinner

This was not written by me, all credit goes to an irl homie of mine. Enjoy the story.

Who’s Waldo?


By: beter_e

Award winning author of the books: weres the lamb sacue, The Curse of the Gnome, Thanso Car goes drivin’, The rise of the Cult, Howard the alien goes to Ikea, Cole’s big mistake, Bage goes to jail, Shrek kills a city, and gorandey ramaseyy kills earth!

Their biggest novel yet!

“I am in love with the characters, cannot contain myself when I hear someone mention them!” -The Little Succ ★★★★★

“Heartwarming, reread it for days!” -Genius Books ★★★★★

“Never has a book made me cry, brilliant.” -The Big Succ ★★★★★


Chapter 1: Finding cash money. Page 2

Chapter 2: Spending cash money. Page 7

Chapter 3: A little undercover needed. Page 11

Chapter 4: An unexpected friend. Page 15

Chapter 5: Looks can be deceiving. Page 19

Chapter 6: A rock and a hard place. Page 24

Chapter 7: Creative revenge. Page 27

Chapter 8: Fallen soldiers. Page 29

Chapter 9: Almost free. Page N/A

(Note, this story takes place on the new world Howard the alien and his friends sat up, not on Earth.)


Chapter 1: Finding cash money.

Waldo was running with police right behind him. He was wearing his world famous striped red and white shirt, paired with blue pants and a hat, plus a pair of glasses. His best friend, The Dog, was running right next to him. Waldo had his dog named The Dog for years now, and they’ve been inseparable. The Dog was known for stealing people's credit cards and giving them to Waldo. Waldo did what he was most known for and would ask his best friend, Zucc, to buy things with it. He never physically hurt anyone, just placed them in a huge debt that would ruin their whole life as they know.

“They’re almost gone!” The strongest, second fastest, and maybe not the smartest police officer yelled. They were the commander of the town’s station, and their name was Lamb sauce, although they are most widely known as his online username, L4mb Sauc3. They’re a thicc boi, and right now they’re going through his emo phase at the ripe age of 102, and the most powerful police officer of the whole town. But, Waldo outbeat them. L4mb Sauc3’s friend, Besse, who is the fastest police officer, tried to shoot Waldo, but it was no use. Instead of his normal clothes, Waldo was wearing bulletproof clothing that looked like his normal clothing.

The Dog jumped onto Besse and slowed him down. The Dog was also wearing a bulletproof vest. The Dog stopped Besse for awhile and ran bacc to Waldo’s side. Waldo made it to the warehouse where he and his friends rested. They locked the door, and L4mb Sauc4 couldn't get in, so he was forced to retreat. Waldo saw his best friends, excluding The Dog, Bage. And his other best friend, Delaney. As much as Delaney liked working with Bage, she wanted to branch out in her criminal career. She once tried to kill Bage, but the taunt of money stopped her.

They were both criminals, but there was something different about Bage. Bage was a snail, and he rode around on a wheelchair. Delaney was known for helping Bage trespass and steal. Bage would steal and trespass while Delaney would cover his tracks. Waldo, The Dog, Bage, and Delaney were the most wanted criminals of all time. Giving the news to someone would be very awkward.

“Hey, be sure to watch out for the most wanted criminals of all time.”

“What do they look like?”

“One of them is a snail, his name is Bage, and his partner, Delaney.”

“A… snail?”

“The other one is a man who looks like Waldo from the books ‘Where’s Waldo?’ And his partner, The Dog.”

“What’s the dog’s name?”

“The Dog.”

“And one of them is a snail?”


“Years of humans had led to a snail being the most dangerous thing of all time. Huh.”

Bacc to Waldo and his friends, Bage was holding his new find. He just stole from Shrek, and he risked so much doing so. Shrek lived just outside of their town, and he hated people getting into his swamp, let alone stealing from his swamp. The fact that Bage and Delaney managed to do such a great feat was incredible. Bage handed over his find to another criminal named Zucc. Zucc was just a floating bald head with blue eyes. No one knew he was a criminal, as his job was to take Bage and Delaney’s finds and sell them, and then later buy things that were too big or risky to steal when they saved enough money, as Waldo and The Dog didn't want to share what money was on that credit card. Zucc also bought things with the cards that Waldo stole. The reason that Waldo, The Dog, Bage, and Delaney couldn't buy nor sell stuff is because if they were to do that, they'll be recognized, and have the police called on them when their guard is down. This once happened to Bage, but luckily, he was a snail, so he was able to crawl out of jail in no time flat.

“So, how’d you two do?” Bage asked.

“The Dog did something very unexpected. He took Howard the alien’s credit card!”

“Oh snapp,” Delaney responded. “How much is it?”

“Billions. Howard the alien is one of the richest aliens in this galaxy.”

“He’s the richest soul of the entire universe!” Bage snapped bacc at Waldo.

“What about alternate universes?” A smooth comebacc from Delaney, if the government didn't go to alternate universes a few years ago to find out that Howard the alien was indeed the most expensive soul in the universe, and for good reasons, like saving an entire planet from Gorandey Ramamseyy’s rage and making a new world.

“Ha, did you read the news, like, two years ago? That statement is false.” Another criminal mastermind walked in. He wasn't the most wanted, but still pretty high up the charts, as he would join Minecraft servers and grief, it might seem small, but at Howard the alien’s conoly, Howard the alien, it was big. And in the city they were living in, called Moisoi, named by Child E, the punishment was life time jail time. The reason he’s so low is that Waldo, The Dog, Bage, and Delaney did their crimes much more often. Their punishment was the same.

The man’s name was Éan, the word Bird in Irish. Yes, his real name is Éan, and he had to memorize what it translated to, as multiple people in Éan’s life asked what his name meant.

“I'm sorry, Éan, but whom has time to pick up their phone and read the news? Not me, not uh. I'm too busy being a better criminal than you.” Delaney spat bacc.

“Just because you’re higher up in the charts doesn't mean you're better than me!”

“Alright, clam down. I'm clearly better than both of you.” Bage said as he wheeled in between them.

“Only because I helped you reach the top! You would be no where if it weren't for me!” Delaney yelled right before she wheeled Bage bacc to where he was before.

“Why y’all arguing? I'm the highest rated criminal of all time, better than what you could do.” Waldo clamly said with a smirk on his face that clearly proved that he was proud of the fact.

“Do we even have time to argue?” Delaney asked. “I mean, we have billions of dollars to spend and no fear of debt.”

“Yes, but what do we spend it on?” Waldo asked.

They all stood there, having no idea what the answer to Waldo’s question would be.

“Maybe on a new hideout? This one is only okay. I feel like we need a new one.” Delaney asked.

“What’s so bad about it?” Waldo asked.

“Waldo, have you seen this place?” Bage responded. “I feel like that the ceiling could fall at any moment! This floor is so bad, we could probably dig through it!” Bage continued. “And the lock on that door, don't get me started on that horrible lock! I always have anxiety of the police breaking down the door and finding us, and throwing us straight in jail. And let me tell you, that's not fun.”

“But guys…” Waldo stopped when he saw that everyone, even The Dog, agreed with Bage. “Okay, fine. You win. We’ll buy a mansion that’ll fit all of us. Zucc will have his own room, Éan will get his, Bage and Delaney will have separate rooms.” Delaney pumped her fist down and her knee up whispering to herself “Yes!” “Hopefully there’s enough rooms for me and The Dog. If not, we’ll share a room.” The Dog barked of joy, implying that he wants to share a room with Waldo. “And, we need a place to keep our loot and money and things like that.”

“Nah, I don't need a room.” Said Éan. “I travel across the whole city, where you go, I go.”

“So you're simply a stalker?” Delaney said, giving Éan a raised eyebrow.

“Pretty much.” Éan responded.

“There are hundreds of mansions here in Howard the alien, but we could go out of town and rest somewhere else in Moisoi.” Zucc said in his normal robotic voice as he looked on their laptop for mansions.

“What other colonies could we go to?” Bage asked.

“There is a couple of mansions located in Thanso car. There is more in 💯. However, there is yet more in Dank Doodle Memes.”

“Check Child E.”

“As requested.” Zucc searched up ‘open homes’ in Child E’s colony. The moment he filtered it by ‘mansion’ he eyes twinkled in amazement and his robotic sounding voice went away. “There are thousands of mansions in Child E.”

“Woah, thousands?” Éan asked.

“I mean, Child E is the most wealthy colony out there. Which means even more money to steal!” Waldo said. He was indeed right. Despite what many colonists think, Howard the alien is not the most wealthiest colony out there. Howard the alien himself gladly donated millions of dollars to his first ever friend, Child E, despite the false myth that Howard the alien’s first friend was Dank Doodle Memes.

“We should buy it right away!” Bage exclaimed.

“Okay.” Zucc said. “I'll put in Howard the alien’s information in right away.” He registered his information, and Howard the alien’s credit card information, and clicked submit.


Chapter 2: Spending cash money.

“Humans, we got a response.” Zucc said louder than normal as Waldo was feeding The Dog, Bage was playing throw the food with Éan, and Delaney was writing a story about her science teacher from 6th grade stealing all her dairy products.

“Woah, we did?” Éan asked.

“What’d they say?” Waldo asked.

“‘Hello Zucc Mark! We are so happy that you are willing to buy a house here in Child E! Unfortunately, we also had 19 other people whom were willing to spend 350,000,0 dollars on this lovely mansion!’” Zucc quoted, before getting interrupted by Bage.

“That means that 665,000,00 dollars were spent on this one mansion!”

“Not uh! 665,000,00 dollars were bidded on this one mansion!” Éan spat at him.

“But no one even knew that others wanted it!” Delaney threw her hands up, and all 5 filled out bacc to front pages of her story flew up, along with her laptop, with the words ‘dairy products’ in the search bar.

“Humans, you must relax.” Zucc said. “‘We require you that you need to go to the mansion at Child E and give us an example of why you would be good house owner.’ Oh no. I do not think any of us could go. Our wanted rank is too high.”

“You could go!” Waldo exclaimed.

“Yes, but what shall I say?”

“We would attach a chip on your ear and tell you what to say.”

“Yeah! A basic invisible chip only costs $30.00!” Bage told them.

“How shall we afford it?” Zucc asked. Despite their robot voice, Zucc is still an alien, and isn’t the smartest at all things.

“Uhh, Zucc? Have you forgot? Me and Bage stole Shrek’s most prized possession, you were the one whom sold it! And we have Howard the alien’s credit card! We’re rich!” Delaney said.

“You guys are correct. I guess we will buy a chip.” Zucc almost sounded disappointed, which was strange from the fact he keeps a monotone voice all the time.

“And we will!” Bage told them.

“No. Zucc will.” Delaney corrected him.

“Alright Zucc. You should be able to find it at Floorshop.” Waldo told him as he took out his laptop and went to tab, a worse version of the search engine, Goggle. He went into maps.

“Waldo, do you normally do the budget version of things?” Bage mockly asked.

“What do you mean?”

“Floorshop, tab. Why not Goggle and baccspace?”

“They’re way too expensive! Have you ever shopped at baccspace? It's always way too expensive.”

“Waldo, neither of you have shopped at baccspace.” Zucc interfered. “You have unlimited money. I don't think you have much to stress.”

“Fine. Load up your laptop and open Goggle maps.” Zucc did as he was told. He looked for the nearest baccspace and bookmarked it.

“Alright, get moving.” Bage told him. Zucc took Howard the alien’s credit card and made his way over to baccspace. He bought the most expensive invisible chip there was, and went bacc to his hideout.

“When do we have that interview?” Waldo asked.


“Alright.” They all went to their rooms as Éan walked out to hide in an abandoned house.

The next day, Zucc got ready for the meeting. He wore a pure white fedora. He placed the earpiece in his ear and went to Child E as the others were following him so that the Redtooth microphone and earpiece would connect to each other without issues.

“Alright Zucc, you're here. Remember what we told you; act natural. If you make it too obvious that we’re here, we’ll get kicked out and have absolutely zero percent chance of getting that house. Got it?” Waldo told Zucc.

“Got it.” Zucc put a big smile on his face and sat down. Sorta. It’s hard to sit down when you're just a floating head.

“Hello Mister Mark. We are very happy about your deal with us. If we feel like that you're worthy of this home, than you will receive it. And, if we were to feel like you aren't worthy, then you won't get it. Remember, it's anyone’s deal!” The person selling Zucc the house said. “I understand that you are also an alien?”

“Correct. There is no need to look at records to find that out.”

“Ah, very nice. You're the only alien bidding on this house. It's nice to meet our own kind. My name is Wife Louis, you may know me from being the spouse of Beter.”

“Woah, Zucc has an interview with Wife Louis?” Delaney quietly exclaimed.

“Guess so, Quite impressive. Didn't know that they were doing that now.” Bage replied.

“Now, Mister Mark, why are you better than your competitors?”

“I have this story that will have a 100% chance of convincing you.” Zucc said.

“Alright Zucc, this better be good.” Waldo commented.

“Oh, a story? I would love to hear it!”

“Perhaps. One cycle of the moon, I I was playing The Sims 3, and my sim’s baby was behind a wall, so I tried to click on it, but it didn't work. So, out of pure ANGER, I said ‘I CAN'T CLICK ON THE CHILD’.”

(Writer’s note: As many of you know, this is a true story that happened when I myself was playing The Sims 3, and it gets me everytime.)

“Ah, you may leave now. I think I heard enough, I'm sure that you'll have a high chance to get this house.”

“Okay.” Zucc said as he stood up and walked out the door and out to the outside world, only to see Waldo, The Dog, Bage, Delaney and Éan obviously hiding in the bushes.

“You know, you guys may say I own a little brain, but I disagree from how terrible this hiding spot is .” Zucc said, turning off their Redtooth earpiece while also turning off the microphone in the process.

“Now is not the time for that, Zucc. That story did you wonders!” Bage said.

“You low IQ peasants kept Bage’s wheel? You know you could have just carried him, right?” Zucc moved his eyes to Bage’s new and improved wheelchair they bought last week when they sold some of Shrek’s stolen stuff. It was bright pink, unlike his old one, which was just a plain blue, and had the letters ‘owo’ on it.

“I'm proud of it! Look at it!” Bage crawled up into his wheelchair.

“You know, bright pink really stands out.” Bage sighed and they all went bacc to their now old hideout and went to sleep.


Chapter 3: A little undercover needed.

It was morning, so they all drove out of Howard the alien and into Child E. They found the mansion they bidded on and unlocked the door. They walked in to smell the fresh smell of strawberries, one of the fruits that has now gone extinct, meaning people and aliens are relying on holograms, which work just as well.

“Wow, this is freshly clean! Neato!” Bage said.

“It’s been so long since I’ve smelled the good smell of fruit bacc on Earth. I miss it.” Waldo said. Despite what many people, police officers and citizens may think, Waldo is not an alien. In fact, the only alien in their gang is Zucc, Delaney and Waldo are humans, Bage is a snail, and The Dog is a Dog.

They all went into their own rooms, and from all the moving, went to sleep.

The next morning, they got up.

“So, should we unpack now?” Waldo asked, rubbing his eye. The Dog barked.

“Uh, Waldo, I think he’s trying to say that we’re already unpacked.” Delaney said. “What we need to do is arrange our furniture.”

“Fine,” Waldo made air quotes. “‘Should we arrange our furniture?’” They all nodded in arrangement, and all of them, excluding Bage, as he’s too small, moved furniture around to their liking. That’s when they heard a knocking on the door.

“Bknock bknock.” The man outside said as he knocked on the door.

“Whomest?” Bage asked.


“Besse whom?” The door got kicked down by Danny Devito, except he had the body of a cheeto. He grew arms and legs and did the Fortnite default dance.

“I’m ‘bout to pull up on your guy’s block. Now stand down in the name of the law!” The police officer, whom the guys guessed was named Besse, said after he was done dancing. He pointed a Nerf gun at them.

“I know you! You and that lamb sauce where the freaks whom chased me down!” Waldo said. The Dog barked angrily.

“And you freaks were the ones whom arrested me!” Bage yelled. “Why are you here?”

“We’ve noticed some strange activity from Howard the alien’s credit card, and was just wondering if you had something to do with it.” The jar of walking and living lamb sauce said.

“Argh, I forgot that they could track that!” Waldo said. Éan crawled in through the window just to see two police officers standing right in front of the doorway.

“Hey, whom are you guys?” Éan asked as he jumped down. “You better not be here for my good friends Waldo and Bage, right?”

“What about me?” Delaney said. The Dog barked.

“Well, you can't arrest a dog, now that’s just cruel. And not Waldo, he was the one whom gave The Dog a good home.” Éan told them.

“That doesn't matter. If anyone breaks the law, they’re gone.” L4mb Sauc3 said. “And whom’s that?” He pointed at Zucc.

“Ack! I forgot about Zucc. Run everyone!” Éan yelled. Everyone did so. They all pushed L4mb Sauc3 and Besse away as they ran out the door and into the woods that was right outside their house.

“It won't take long until they find us.” Delaney said. “These woods aren't very big.”

“Then how do we escape those two?” Waldo asked.

“Maybe, if we were to find a criminal that was lower in the ranks…” Bage pondered out loud. “Then they’ll be impressed and help us out.”

“Bage, that idea is pure brilliant!” Waldo said, still in the whisper they all were talking in. The Dog quietly barked.

“Bet I could come up with something better.” Delaney told herself. They all managed to get out of the forest and dodge Besse and L4mb Sauc3. They found their way into DDMs, as Éan suggested.

“Éan, why are we here?” Delaney asked.

“Look, I know someone from here. One time, when I was sneaking from house to house, I came across this girl named Fiona.” Éan explained.

“If she’s so good, then how come we’ve never heard of her?” Delaney inturped, which led to them to give a confused look to Éan.

“I dunno. Maybe she’s only popular here.” They all walked until Bage found a ‘wanted!’ poster hanging on a street pole.

“Yo Éan, is this her?” Bage said as she motioned his head to the poster. As a snail, he is unable to point. Sure enough, there she was, Fiona, whom looked exactly like Fiona from Shrek.

“I, yeah, that’s her, in all her glory.” Éan said as he took down the poster and shoved it in his purple baccpack. “Guess she’s grown from her career, criminal wise.” He stopped the book titled ‘Caught on Fire’ from falling out of his bag and zipped it up.

“When are you going to stop carrying around your love stories?” Delaney asked as she walked behind Éan and zipped down his baccpack to pull out another story called ‘The Meaning of Happiness.’

“Uh, when we get arrested.” Éan took the book from her hands and placed it bacc in his bag. “Which will be never.”

“But Éan,” Waldo spoke up. “What if we do? Like, sure, you’ll lose all your books and maybe scar the policemen when they read it, but also, what will we do?” They all lost their smiles when they pondered Waldo’s question.

“Well,” Bage finally broke the silence. “We work together to get out. I’ll use my size and you’ll use your speed. I’ve been to jail before, I know what it’s like, even worse then how they show it on TV.”

“And we won’t leave until we got every single one of you.” Bage said. “Waldo, The Dog, Éan, Dealney, me, and, well, if it happens, Zucc.”

“We all agree with what Bage said, right?” Waldo asked the group. They all nodded, expect Delaney.

“Delaney, do you agree?” Zucc asked. Delaney was spaced out, thinking about that one questionable chapter of one of Éan’s books. Even though she would always mock Éan from the strange stories he had in his bright purple baccpack that he would always carry around, she would steal them and read them. Not all the chapters, just some of her favorites and the ones Éan would always talk about.

“Hm? Oh yeah, I agree. I would never ever leave any one of you guys behind. Especially Bage.” Of course, that was a total lie. She would be a tad sad if she was forced to leave behind his friends, and would be really sad if it were Éan, but she didn't care about Bage very much. In fact, she might be even happier at the sight of leaving him at the jail.

“Okay, good.” Éan said. “Now, let’s go find Fiona!” They went bacc to following Éan. Éan led them over to a worn down house. It had a faded shade of paint of what was most likely a sky blue, and there was a large hole right in the roof. There was a tape with the words ‘CONDEMNED’ around it, along with the word condemned in alien language, which was simply ‘DENMEDNOC’. Despite the fact that every alien knows how to speak English, as it is their native language, not a lot of them know how to read it. In fact, Howard the alien was a teacher for English, as he was the only alien whom knew how to read English after Mars’ ruler, E, died from Howard the alien’s evil brother, Boward the Alien.

“Er, Éan, are you sure that this house is safe to go in?” Bage asked.

“Oh, I’m sure of it!” Éan said as he tore down the tape and walked through, with others following.


Chapter 4: An unexpected friend

They walked into the house to see cobwebs in the corner and the smell of burnt pie.

“Ugh,” Delaney remarked as she saw the scenery before her. “if this is someone’s hideout, at least make it good.”

“Delaney!” Éan told her louder than he needed to, causing Delaney to jump. “You want your hideout to look run down so people don't check! Then you won't get caught.” He winked at Waldo.

“Why is this directed at me?” Waldo asked. “It was Bage whom said we needed a better one, I was forced to agree. You were there, Éan!”

“So this is all Bage’s fault.” Delaney said, to her amusement. “I knew we should all blame it on him.” Everyone ignored Delaney’s words and kept on walking through the house. They found someone. She looked exactly like Fiona from Shrek.

“Hello! Éan has told me all about you guys! You must be Waldo,” She pointed at Waldo. “you must be Bage, you must be Delaney, and you must be Zucc. And there’s The Dog. Unique names, to say the least. Waldo and Delaney is fine.”

“Hi Fiona. Éan has told us that you would be able to help us.” Waldo said as he shook Fiona’s hand.

“Now, I won’t be able to help, but I do know someone whom can.” Fiona moved to the side. “Everyone, meet Justice Stools. Bronze should be coming soon, right?”

“Hello, peasants. My name is Justice Stools, and I am a communist leader of all the stools in the world, and all the furniture in every Ikea in the world.”

“Wow, what’s bigger, the number of stools you control or your ego?” Delaney asked as she tilted her head.

“Hey Justice Stools!” A stool with a bronze color came running in with a note in her hand. She was panting. “Here’s a message from Howard the alien.”

“Everyone, this is Bronze Dotcomm. She’s the messenger for Justice.” Justice cleared his throat. “Sorry, Justice Stools.” Fiona said.

“Give me the note, slave.” Justice said as he snacthed away the note from Bronze.

“I’m not a slave…” Bronze mumbled.

“You said it was from Howard the alien?” Waldo asked. “What does it say?”

“Um, excuse me?” Justice yelled. Delaney couldn't put her finger on it, but she suddenly felt less like a woman. “This is private information! I don’t know what makes you think that you’re entitled to it, but you're not!” Justin’s voice went from a deep one to a high pitched squeaking.

“Okay, jeez, I just asked a question. You don’t need to be such a drama queen.” Justice sighed loudly and opened up the letter.

Dear Justice Stools,

Thank you so much for going undercover to catch those blasted criminals. As I stated in our agreement, we will trade Waldo, The Dog, Delaney, Bage, Éan, and that new alien, whom is named apparently Zucc, full name Zucc Mark, he’s the only alien I know with a last name, for half of my wealth. The next chance you get to talk to this Zucc, please ask him where he was all the time. Once again, thank you.

-Howard the alien

“Would you like me to send one bacc, or…” Bronze mumbled again.

“Don’t you dare!” Justice yelled, which scared everyone, even Éan, whom was known for being hard as a rock. “Throw this letter in the bin, and if you have enough time, you can jump in too!” Justice laughed, loud and insane.

“Yes, Justice Stools.” Bronze walked past Waldo and the gang, with each of them having sympathy on their face.

“So, how will this spoiled brat be able to help us?” Delaney asked. She only knew him for a few minutes, but she already hated him.

“Look, commoners.” Justice’s voice was a surprisingly high pitch for a man. “I know that it might be too much to stand around my brilliance, but alas, I know that weak little criminals will need help with someone whom is a thousand times more famous than you.”

“Um, Justice,” Delaney said as she Goggled Justice Stools. “We are ranked number 1 in popularity, you are ranked number 1,000.”

“Ugh, whom gave you Goggle? Peasants like you don’t deserve such luxury.” Justice walked deeper into the house, as did the gang.

“But,” Delaney started. “Goggle is a free search engine. Almost everyone has it.”

“Free?” Justice yelled, his voice getting high. “I paid ten million quid to get my hands on this, and I just found out that it’s free!” Justice’s voice was so high that it caused the glass window to break.

“Well then, Justice Stools,” Waldo said. “I’m not very sorry to say this, you’ve been ripped off.” Justice fell to his knees and screamed. Afterwards, the gangs ears hurt. Even Bage, as he has the ears of a human.

“Éan, you caused this.” Delaney said as she held her hands to her ears.

“I’m sorry!” Éan said. “Last time I saw him, he was really nice. I don’t know what happened.” He shrugged.

“Now now.” Justice started. “No need to admire my greatness, twas just a mere Tuesday to me.”

“Justice,” Delaney said. Her amused voice sounded like she was disappointed in him. “We weren’t admiring you. We were questioning what happened that led to you being so full of yourself.” Justice sighed louder again and walked in front of the group.

“Éan, do you know what happened to Fiona?” Waldo asked. “It’s like she disappeared into thin air!”

“Yeah, same with The Dog.” Bage added. “Where are they?”

“Yes.” Zucc said. “Éan, do you think it is possible for Justice to be aware of where The Dog and Fiona are?”

“Oh-ho-ho. I have something to tell you, weaklings.” Justin started. “She took your little dog and threw him in jail.”


Chapter 5: Looks can be deceiving

Bage, Éan, Waldo, Zucc, and Delany stood there, dumbfounded. Not one of them would have thot that any of them would be in jail, if so, only for a few minutes. And now, The Dog was in jail.

“We can’t give up now.” Waldo spoke up. “We will go to the local jail and break out our friend. And we will not get caught in the process.”

“Yeah,” Delaney said. “we won’t let those stupid police officers lay a finger on us! We’re invincible!” The rest of the gang agreed with her. They walked out of the house and went bacc into the forest. Luckily, the jail wasn’t very far away. If it was, they would have heard much more of Waldo’s venting.

“It’s like, they don’t even acknowledge the fact that they just arrested a dog!” Waldo said for the billionth time. They all agreed with him, not saying much.

When they finally reached the jail, they had to come up with a plan on how to get in.

“We could send Zucc,” Bage started. “but now Zucc is also wanted. I saw a poster on the way here.”

“Then what do we do?” Waldo asked. They all stood there, having no idea what the answer to Waldo’s question would be, while also having a small feeling of deja vu.

“We gang up,” Delaney said. “And we take them by force. And we’ll get The Dog, no matter what it takes.” They all agreed with Delaney.

“So, how do we do this?” Bage asked.

“I’m thinking we just charge.” Éan replied. “We kick open the door, and run through all the cells ‘till we reach The Dog. And knock over any police officers in the process.” They all agreed with Éan. They got up and did Éan plan word for word, from kicking down the door and charging.

“This is going better than I expected!” Delaney yelled as Bage rammed his wheelchair into a police officer.

“Make sure we do not run into Besse and L4mb Sauc3.” Zucc said.

“Aw, Zucc!” Bage yelled. “You’re gonna jinx it!” Despite the disappointment he tried to make, Bage was smiling as the police officer ran away from him; which she failed at.

They did quite well in their plan. The police officers fell and they rose. They ran past hundreds upon hundreds of cells, with some of them filled with criminals. They were edging towards the top of the building, and they knew that they’ll find The Dog somewhere. But, they reached the roof, and there was no dog in sight, just each other.

“Alright,” Waldo said. “so, we ran all the way to the top, yet we haven’t found The Dog.”

“Do you think he’s in a different jail?” Delaney suggested.

“Maybe. But why?” Éan asked. “It would seem most convenient to just put him in the nearest jail.” They all stayed silent, keeping a lookout for police officers.

“Unless,” They all looked up when Bage said something. “They knew we were coming here, and they did take The Dog to another jail. They wasted our time!”

“And I can guarantee that they didn’t think that we’d do so well with invading this place!” Delaney said. Once again, the gang was hyped up with energy. They walked down and noticed the lack of police officers and criminals astonished from the fact that someone so high up in their jail. In fact, someone even tried to write Éan a love letter. He politely declined, but kept the letter. He enjoyed the wording.

“I’m kinda amazed that L4mb Sauc3 and Besse aren’t here.” Éan said as he shoved the letter in his purple baccpack that he always carries around. Even in his sleep.

“They’re probably at another jail, honestly.” Waldo said. They agreed with him.

“The one that The Dog is at.” Bage told them. Of course, this was just a guess.

“Alright Bage.” Delaney said. “If you’re so sure, then where is The Dog?”

Bage stayed silent for some time. “Well,” he said. “that’s the fun part!” Once again, the gang was hyped up, so they went out of the jail and Delaney pulled out her phone. Normally, anyone would do this, but Delaney was the only one whom had a phone case, which was of Minecraft Steve.

Delaney Goggled Goggle Maps and looked for local jails near her. She prayed that she doesn't lose her phone, as those stores all her stories. She marked another local jail.

“Alright guys,” she started. “We could get there faster if we went through the forest.” She pointed. They all nodded and followed her finger. Delaney led the way, but half-way, they saw movements that wasn’t their own.

“Did y'all see that?” Éan asked.

“Yeah,” Bage started. “I ain't saying we should go off track, but we should totally follow that.” He wheeled towards the shadow.

“What?” Waldo yelled. “We need to find The Dog, not follow some stupid shadow!” He glared at Bage, feeling his face turning red. “If you want to, go ahead, but I’m not letting my best friend get arrested!”

“How about we vote on it?” Éan suggested.

“Yeah, vote.” Waldo emphasized the word vote. Why, he didn’t know why. He was angry and it happened.

“Alight,” Éan started. “Anyone who stands with Waldo, stand with Waldo. Anyone who stands with Bage, stand with Bage. I, myself, am standing with Bage.”

“Well, there’s no way I would stand with Bage,” Delaney said. “So, Waldo.”

“So, who’s the winner?” Waldo asked, his voice still loud.

“Eh, we seem to have come to a tie.” Éan told them. Éan waited for someone to speak up, yet they were all staring at him. “Well, how about, we split up? And then later meet at, somewhere.”

“Yeah, I’ll find a place.” Delaney said as she pulled out her phone again and went to Goggle Maps. Suddenly, they heard something, yet it didn’t sound like the other things they heard. In fact, it sounded like a stool.

“Whom’s there?” Éan yelled as he turned baccwards, only to see Bronze Dotcomm.

“Hi guys!” She said with an exhausted smile. “Don’t worry, I’m here to help. And I need to tell you something.” She caught her breath before she started talking again. “You know your alien friend? Zucc? Zucc Mark?”

“Yeah,” Delaney said. “I’ve been meaning to ask where he went. Kinda, disappeared.”

“Well, you guys should totes follow that shadow! Trust me, it’ll lead you to both The Dog, and Zucc!”

“You don’t sound very trustworthy.” Waldo told her with a raised eyebrow. “Honestly, this makes me want to stand with Delaney. And I will.” Waldo walked over to the one.

“Well, I trust her.” Éan said. There was an awkward silence as he waited for someone to agree with him. Bage wheeled over to him, knowing it’ll be a bunch of insults if he and Delaney are close together for any longer.

“Slave!” They heard a voice from the distance. “Get bacc here, or I’ll bring out the belt!” From the voice, they knew it was Justice Stools, whom was calling for Bronze.

“Sorry, gotta dash!” She said before running off. They all looked at Éan, who stood his ground.

“Well, I guess we split up now.” Éan said. “Good luck to you.”

“Good luck to you too.” Delaney told him. Waldo gave him a stare. They split their ways.

Bage noticed that he was not able to move his wheelchair. He slowly crawled down to see the issue. One of the wheels seemed to have popped out

By this time, Éan couldn't see the shadow as much now, so he had to guess a bit. The walk was longer than he thought it would be, so he read a bit of the books in his baccpack.

As Éan was reading looking without looking in front of him, he screamed “bruh” as he tripped over a foot. He looked up to see L4mb Sauc3, whose DUMMY THICC foot he tripped over belonged to. He saw The Dog in a dog carrier and Zucc, who was somehow in handcuffs, despite his lack of hands.

“Zucc, you, have hands?” That was all Éan was able to say when he saw the image in front of him.

“I am very sorry I have not yet told you about my lack of hands. I was born without.”

“Bruh.” Was all Éan was able to say to that. He stood up and grabbed his book and put it bacc in his baccpack. He made intense eye contact with L4mb Sauc3, keeping his eyes slanted in a lazy way, looking uninterested.

“As you can see,” L4mb Sauc3 started. “We managed to find two of your friends. Now, go with, or else we’ll hurt them.” Éan kept eye contact, blinking slowly.

“Ok.” He said before nonchalantly grabbing the keys on L4mb Sauc3’s uniform and unlocking The Dog from his carrier.

“No, you can’t do that!” L4mb Sauc3 yelled at him, wacking the keys from his hands. Éan picked the keys bacc up and started to unlock again, opening the door. The Dog rushed out and grabbed the keys that unlock Zucc’s handcuffs. He gave them to Éan.

“Good boy!” Éan said to him as he ruffled The Dog’s head before walking over to Zucc.

“Quit it!” L3mb Sauc3 punched Éan, which took him off guard. Bage had no clue what was going on. It seemed like Éan forgot that he was a snail and therefore could not move as fast. He could hear the two yelling, yet he was too far away to make out what.

Bage would have gotten there faster, but one of the wheels on his wheelchair broke. No one seemed to notice the snail with a human head crawl down his wheelchair and start crawling. Éan didn’t care much for Bage due to the fact that he doesn’t enjoy the stories he and Delaney enjoy, so he didn’t notice his disappearance.

“Alrighty then.” L4mb Sauc3 scowled at them. “I guess you two don’t like your poor snail friend to be stuck in prison.” Zucc looked over at him, his eyes widening.

“Poor snail friend, Bage!?” Éan screamed at the top of his lungs. “You donkey! What did you do to Bage?” He pointed a finger at him.

“What did you think? Are you that dumb? He’s crawling around in jail. Again.” L4mb Sauc3 made a chuckle. “Toodles. You can keep that dog and alien, by the way. They were really more of a prop.” He wiggled his fingers at Éan as he walked away. Éan fell to his knees and looked up towards the sky before he screamed, loud and clear.


Chapter 6: A rock and a hard place

‘uh guys I just found something out and you need to come NOW’ Éan quickly texted in the gang’s group chat as he ran towards the prison the other members were going to in search of The Dog and Zucc. The Dog and Zucc were running with him, Zucc going the fastest due to his lack of legs.

‘What happened?’ Delaney asked. ‘We’re at the prison. Can you just come to us’

‘has that police officer came yet the lamb sauce one’

‘we don’t know’ Waldo texted. ‘we’re at the back. you know where bage is’

‘that's the issue! he’s gone! i have the dog and zucc but they arrested bage’ Éan turned off his phone to help him run faster. He sprinted as fast as he could, The Dog trailing behind him. Éan didn’t know how far the prison was, but from the fact that the others could get there at walking pace in the short time he encountered L4mb Sauc3 made him think that it wasn’t that far away.

“Location found!” Zucc screamed as they ran even faster when they saw the top of the prison peeking out from the trees. The two boys followed. When they finally reached the prison, they looked around for their gang. Delaney and Waldo both looked the most worried they ever been.

“Guys!” Éan called as he waved his hand. He bent down to catch his breath, as well as Zucc, despite the lack of a bacc he has.

“Bage, Bage.” Waldo exclaimed, giving a few pats to The Dog, who was jumping on him. “Do you have any updates on Bage? Please? He was the first person I met on this new world.” Waldo started to get tears in his eyes, which is unlike him. He quickly wiped them in hope no one noticed.

“No updates,” Éan started. “but I know that he’ll be there! I have a feeling!” He banged a fist against his open palm.

Delaney was about to reply with a sarcastic remark, but the thought of Bage actually dying scared her. Sure, she always played out such a scene in her head, but now that that is really happening, she wants to hit her past self.

“Well, we better go!” Waldo screamed at them as he ran towards the front of the prison. The rest followed. Waldo knocked down the door, pulling out a pocket knife. He’s never used it before, but now seems like the perfect time. He flipped it open and the gang followed him. They expected there to be a bundle of police officers, but there wasn’t.

“So, does anyone else see the issue here?” Delaney asked. Even with the lack of police officers, though, she still kept a clenched fist, ready to strike.

“You’d think that they’re on break,” Zucc started, almost losing his monotone voice from the panic of losing Bage. “but there should be more police officers to replace them. Something is wrong.”

“You know that we should be running, right?” Éan told them. “Because, you know, running makes you faster.” He started to go into a slow jog before the rest of the group took what he meant and began to run with him.

“We should split up.” Waldo told them. “Cover more ground.” The rest nodded. Delaney, Zucc, and Éan went on their own path, while The Dog followed Waldo. However, none of them found anything except for Waldo.

“Bage!” He yelled the moment he saw Bage’s blonde hair. He began to run towards the snail, but got stopped by an arm. As it turned out, that arm belonged to L4mb Sauc3, and they were not happy. In fact, the whole police force was not happy.

“So,” The police officer that looked like Danny Dachetto with the name tag ‘Besse’ started. “where is the rest of you? We got your little snail friend right here, and, not gonna lie, he kinda cute.”

“Let me go! This is stupid! You just arrested a snail!” Bage yelled at him. One of the police officers covered his mouth to stop him from talking.

“Seriously.” Besse said. “What happened to ‘The Gang’? Aren’t you guys like, bestest of friends? What happened?” Besse’s taunting words of Waldo’s greatest fear made Waldo have to hold in tears. Waldo has never told anyone, but his greatest fear isn’t getting arrested. His greatest fear is losing his friends, and being a solo man.

“We’re working together!” Waldo yelled at him, trying to stop the blurriness that was building up in his eyes. “Unlike you, pigs! Now let go of Bage! Now!”

“We’re armed, by the way.” Éan told them as he and the other two walked in. It was unknown whether or not Éan was telling the truth, aside from the small pocket knife in Waldo’s hand.

“Ooh!’ Besse exclaimed. “I see the freakfest has finally gotten back together. We all love a good reunion!” He smiled in a twisted way at them, fully aware that they hold little power.

“We’re going to end you.” Delaney growled at them.

“Oh, we’re so scared! Please don’t hurt us!” Besse said in a fake weak voice.

“Sorry,” Waldo said before cracking his knuckles. “but, we’re gonna have to break that promise.” He prepared the pocket knife in his hands, and then threw it at Besse. Despite the fact that he’s one year away from being thirty, he managed to hit Besse right in his forehead, which made Besse promptly fall to the ground. This was the first time anyone of them ever physically hurt a police officer.

The small amount of red blood that was leaking out of Besse’s forehead surprised everyone in the room. Most people don’t think that Besse is a human, and that he is an alien, to which aliens bleed blue blood.

“Did you just,” L4mb Sauc3 started. Besse was their partner, and seeing him lying on the ground slowing losing blood caused him to lower his normally screaming voice. “is he going to die?” The jar of lamb sauce screamed. “What did you do?”

“Sorry, but we’ll do anything for our buddy Bage.” Waldo told them as he walked up to Besse and pulled the knife out of his forehead. Besse was still alive and awake, but his vision was very blurry. He gave Besse another stab in his brown eyes. Besse found himself searching for air as his vision went bright, before he took his last breath.

“Is he,” Lam4 Sauc3 started before The Dog charged at him and made him fall to the ground. Waldo and the others ran to Bage and pushed the police officer that was covering his mouth. Delaney grabbed onto Bage by his shell and they ran. They didn’t know where they were going, they just ran.

Delaney had one last question before she got arrested. They were ducked behind a table “Éan, what’s in the purple baccpack you always carry around? I’ve never seen what’s in it.” She pointed to it.

“Bombs.” Éan remarked. He dug into his baccpack to pull out a stick of dynamite, only to put it back. “Wrong one.” He pulled out a few dozen bags full of bath bombs, and millions of gallons of water. “Bombs. We’re going to drown the place.”


Chapter 7: Creative revenge

“That,” Waldo started. “how did that even fit?”

“It is a Mary Poppins’ bag, Waldo.” Zucc repiled. “I know because I helped him make it.” Éan kept on pulling out bath bombs.

“It’s gonna smell horrible when we’re done.” Bage remarked. “Also, how will I be able to help you with this? I’m a snail.”

“Don’t worry, Bage.” Éan told them. “I got a launcher just for you.” He pulled out a grenade launcher and stuck colorful bath bombs in it. He gave it to Bage, which he picked up with his neck and used his antenna to press down on the trigger.

“I’ll carry him.” Delaney told them as she grabbed onto Bage and held him in her hand. Normally, she wouldn’t do this, but after almost losing her partner, it seems implied.

“So, you all ready?” Éan asked them. “Pour the water down everywhere. Then the bath bombs. Everywhere, bath bombs. Remember that they’re still looking for us, and remember that 99% of the people in this building are going to drown within the hour.”

The Dog barked, so Éan gave him a pat before pulling out more water. “Don’t worry, I got some for you too.” The Dog took the water and growled, hoping that that growl will somehow reach the police officers.

“Well, should we drown the place?” Delaney said as she cracked her fingers.

“I still think there is human life form that is not a police officer in here.” Zucc told them. “Are we sure that we want to risk their lives?”

“We should free them as we find them.” Éan told them. “Just hope they run fast.” He picked up his baccpack and put it on. He prepared to take the first gallon of water and took off the cap. “Everyone ready?”

“Ready as I'll ever be.” Bage told him. Éan nodded and started to pour out the water. The other followed his lead, gallons upon gallons of water filled the space. This surprised the police officers that were looking for them, and it surprised them even more when Delaney came out with Bage in her hand, as she poured out more water which caused them to slip and as Bage hit them with bath bombs.

Zucc poured water down as they released the criminals. They were the only one whom were letting them free. The criminals were tripped over the water, as well as the others, except for Zucc, as they don’t have any feet. The water started to rise more and more as the gang poured more water down.

No one else in the gang knew where the others were, aside from Bage and Delaney. Waldo and The Dog were separated, which was quite strange for the two. Bage and Delaney were at the roof, Delaney pouring water into the police officer’s eyes that were trying to get them, and Bage shot the bath bombs at them, knocking them bacc.

Soon, Waldo had to retreat to the second floor from how flooded the place got. He didn’t know how he was going to get down from here, since the prison has about 20 floors, and there’s no way he could jump it, but it was all he could do.

Soon, all of them met up on the roof. No police officers were chasing them, most likely because they drowned from the water that was leaking up into the roof. They were surrounded by prisoners that were unlocked on the upper floors and weren’t able to get down. Well, almost all of them.

“Where’s Bage?” Waldo screamed as Delaney and Éan held the door that led to the roof closed to keep the water in.

“I don’t know! He’s probably up here somewhere.” Delaney screamed back.

“Everyone,” Waldo screamed to the prisoners, Zucc, and The Dog. “go look for Bage!” Everyone looked for the snail, but their attempts were useless. Bage was nowhere on the roof. Waldo watched as the last of the water poured out of the entrance of the prison and Éan and Delaney didn’t need to hold the door open.

“What’s if he’s inside?” Delaney asked Waldo as he looked over the roof.

“Maybe.” Waldo hoped Bage wasn’t dead; that he managed to find a free space that didn’t hold water. He opened the door and looked in to see Bage, lying on the ground, dead.


Chapter 8: Fallen Soldiers

Waldo fell to his knees when he saw his best friend lying dead on the ground. His dark eyes moved across Bage’s body. He took his small head and made Bage’s dead eyes look at him.

“From how he looks, I’m guessing he drowned when we released the bombs.” Zucc told him. “We should plan his funeral.”

“I think that the hideout would fit pretty well.” Delaney remarked. “It’s what he would have wanted.”

“I think we need to think about the bigger picture here.” Éan told them. “We just destroyed our biggest enemy. We’re free!” Waldo ignored him, too distressed from what just happened to Bage.

“Éan, feel the mood.” Delaney told him as she snapped her fingers. “You’re always terrible with these sort of things.” The Dog walked up to Bage and sniffed him, then slightly pushed his head. Waldo felt his eyes get watery and his nose got stuffed. He tried his best to hold back tears and stood up, picking up Bage in the process.

“We should bury him.” Waldo told the gang. “I don’t care if we get caught in the process.” The others looked at him like he was insane; even The Dog did. “We’ve sacrificed so much to get to this point of the prison being destroyed and L4mb Sauc3 and Besse dead, and this was our reward?”

“Waldo, he wouldn’t want us greving.” Delaney told him, placing her hand on his shoulder, to which he shrugged off. “He died for us.”

“What do you know?” Waldo yelled at her. “You were his partner, and hated him! Everyone knew this! You should have been Éan’s partner!” Tears started to fall down his face. “You could have Éan’s, and, and,” It was hard for him to say this. “I would have been Bage’s.” He declared. “I would have been Bage’s. But now, but now I can’t, because he’s dead, and, and it’s all your fault.” He wanted to squeeze onto Bage’s body, but didn’t want to squish him.


“No! Shut up shut up shut up!” Waldo screamed at them before running down the stairs, forgetting about the damage that they did to the building. He didn’t notice the hole in the floor that formed from the water hitting it, and tripped over some fallen rubble, falling straight into the hole.

The others ran forward to see what happened. Waldo laid there, groaning in pain and misery. He was scared to see what happened to Bage, and hoped his shell would protect him. He made a sigh of relief when Bage was still intact. He looked up towards the others, seeing what their reaction to his idiocy would be. Delaney jumped down beside him as he looked up.

“You alright?” Waldo nodded his head, then stood up as well. He walked down the stairs, keeping Bage close to his chest. The others jumped down and followed him, making sure not to slip on the water puddles that were scattered around.

“You know, aside from the whole Bage thing,” Éan started. “this was pretty successful.” Waldo drowned out his talking with ideas on what Bage would like to have placed next to his grave. “We killed all the people who want to kill us, we’re basically free.”

“Don’t go off saying things like that.” Delaney told him. “You’re going to jinx it.” Éan rolled his eyes.

“I think that it would be better for us to walk in silence.” Zucc told the two. “Give Waldo a chance to grieve.” The Dog barked in approval, which got Waldo out of his thoughts.

“At least I still have my other best friend.” Waldo said in a mourning voice.
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