errr theres no law agenst it that makes illegal

If you were hacking, yes.
If they got charged extra for the refund.... sort of, yeah.
If they canceled the refund and kept your money after the ban... i dunno

Absolutely.

When you issue a charge-back, Pay-Pal/your bank not only takes the money you paid from the merchant's account, but they also often charge an additional fee. This often happens after they money you gave them after the merchant has already spent the money and then they're on the hook for the full amount after the refund/charge-back. If you want to charge something back, don't assume they will want to do business with you anymore because at that point you've made yourself a liability for them.

I read that you worked it out (congrats!) but yeah, this isn't unusual. By the way: I think "refunding" maybe not the best description here, what you basically did was a "payment chargeback" (I know both mean the same thing, but this is easier to understand), and this means you contacted your payment facility to get your money back but not necessarily the server owners.

Yet if you do this without contacting the server owners then you're basically scamming them because then you still have the perks yet didn't pay for them. And I'm sure that this will result in a permban on most servers.

So: always contact the server owners first, then after that consider the chargeback. But not the other way around.

i depends on the how they want to setup the store in the agreements. which you would need to mark that you have read and agree before you would have purchased anything from there webstore.

It is up to the server owner to decide how to handle that type of thing.. but yes, they can ban you. They probably thought you were trying to scam them. Perhaps send them a message and explain things? You might be able to be unbanned. Instead of refunding your purchase, you should have asked the owners for a refund due to it not being what you expected. Regardless, they can still say no. You should only buy things you are sure of, and never, ever, cancel it. You look shady doing that.