For decades, humans have used the unintelligent species of rodents, rats, as subjects for scientific experiments and trials. These rodents are commonly referred to as "lab rats" by humans. Seeing as their populations were constantly repressed by scientists eager to learn more about their fields, the rats were unable to escape the clutches of life as a test-dummy for humans.

Slowly, the ferret species (weasels are always more intelligent than rats; it's common knowledge) began to notice that the rat population was becoming more and more deprived of its former glory. No longer were there sneaky rats prowling the streets of dark cities, nor were there many rats entitled to any freedom whatsoever. The ferrets, in order to investigate this matter, began observing the maltreatment that the lab rats were receiving. Over time, as the ferrets watched the scientists perform their experiments, the ferrets were able to catch on to basic concepts regarding the sciences and other such intellectual fields of study.

The ferrets repeated this process throughout the course of many years - they watched, and learned. Watched, and learned. They watched. And then they learned. The more the learned, the more they were capable of conducting their own science experiments, which they readily did in their own forest homes. Their most shocking discovery was a genetically engineered peanut capable of acquiring any flavor, whether it be salted, unsalted, honey, roasted, etc. These new peanuts gradually became more and more common in the ferret community, and were becoming more widespread as a food product.

One day, a scientist taking a break from lab work wandered off into the forest, in hopes of finding something interesting. Unfortunately for him, he did not find anything remotely intriguing.

Another day, a different scientist decided to observe nature's beauty in the same forest, where he accidentally stumbled across a ferret scampering away through the bushes. The scientist began to follow the ferret's footprints, hoping to learn where he was scampering off too. He trailed the footprints for about a minute, until he found a glowing peanut laying just beside the tracks.

Abandoning his quest, the second scientist returned to the lab to analyze the peanut, and instantly found out about its unique qualities (it was one of those ferret-engineered peanuts, in case you haven't caught on yet). In a frenzy of excitement, the scientist called over his friend, who asked where he found the peanut. In less of a frenzy, the scientist answered that he found it in a trail of ferret tracks. Together, the two friends tracked down the ferret responsible for this marvel of a peanut.

Something else happened, and eventually they found Albert.

Albert and the others joined the team, creating a group of researchers and scientists that would come to be known as "lab ferrets."



beware the lab ferret.