Sir Tobias Hammond was known to be obsessively hygienic. His germiphobic habits were annoying to all around him, but they also
had saved his life many times.
Over a good half a decade, Sir Tobias had survived many an assassination attempt via germiphobia. When he was washing his
hands one day, he had bent over to grab a new soap bar from his special Soap Basket. It had been at that moment when
an assassin fired an arrow through Hammond's window. Luckily for the obsessive knight, he had bent down just before the arrow
could have hit him. The arrow ended up striking Hammond's maid right in her left thigh as she was entering
the wash room to give her master a new Soap Basket. Sir Tobias, after noticing the condition of his poor
maid, had exclaimed "good Lord, Agatha! You should be more careful, firing bows around and whatnot!"
Agatha had quit not long after, and went onto a much more succsessful career of baking.
Another occasion of perhaps extreme coincedence was when an assassin dressed up as kindly old lady came to Hammond's castle.
Upon entering, he (yeah, it's a he. Think Little Red Riding Hood) had drawn a knife from under his cloak and proceeded to sneak up on the sleeping Hammond, fixing
to slit his throat. Fortunately for Sir Tobias (but unfortunately for the would-be killer), the assassin slipped on a soap bar that had been left on the floor.
After a good deal of slipping and cursing quietly, the 'kindly old woman' tripped forward and fell into the fireplace, where he was immediately consumed in flame.
When Hammond had awoken, he was puzzled as to why he had the smell of cooked meat in his home, since he was also a vegetarian.
Clueless as he was, Sir Tobias was a kindly man, and only became angry if A: someone sneezed, coughed, barfed, choked, shook his hand, or 'relieved oneself' on him
or B: someone brought meat to his banquets.
Sir Tobias Hammond would carry on to live until the age of 73, when lye from soap he had ingested poisoned him fatally. After his death, most who knew him did not know
whether to rejoice or mourn the loss. So, after a lengthy discussion on which course of action to take, they all decided to do neither.
THE END

________________________________
My entry in a skin battle with Terreen. The theme is 'Knights with a twist', or something along those lines.
Check out his entry here!:http://www.planetminecraft.com/skin/knight-of-tasty-armor--mmmmm---knobleknives-battle/

Palette's still on the skin. Feel free to use it at your discretion :).
________________________________

For those with no previewer: