Azul woke up. It was still dark; it couldn’t be a minute after 1:00. Everything was silent, softly illuminated by the streetlights outside. She rose from her bed, gazing around her room. Azul lived alone in a small apartment away from the metropolis, and she liked that. Even though she sometimes felt as though she was missing out on the glamorized city life, Azul preferred to live alone, rather than be cramped with three other people.




Azul wandered over to her window, which provided the only light in the room. It looked out upon the town, and gave her a view of the skyscrapers in the distance, their lights shining solemnly into the night. Tonight was no different from any other night; the world continued to move, the city never sleeping. Something spoke to her, though, telling her that something was missing. It whispered to her, “Come.” The skyline called her.



Almost unconsciously, Azul wandered out of her room, and into the living area of her apartment. The light from the windows glowed a soft blue on the walls, once more the only source of illumination in the room. She didn’t know where, exactly, she was going, but all she knew was that she had to go. Through the windows, Azul could still see the skyline on the horizon, gently pulling her towards it. After throwing on an over-shirt with a moon design, she opened her door and stepped out.



Here, outside of her apartment, the air was much cooler. She lived on the second floor of the complex, which gave her a clear view of the horizon. From where she stood, Azul could see all the way to the city, which was now silhouetted by moonlight; her destination lay somewhere within. She slowly wandered down the hall, towards the staircase that led out of the complex. Azul looked back only once, conflicted on whether to return to safety; she knew she couldn’t stay, though, and silently tiptoed down the stairs.



For the first time since she had woken up, Azul had a sense of direction. She knew where she needed to go. It wasn’t her destination that she knew, but something that would get her there. Often, Azul had thoughts about getting on the town bus and seeing how far she could go, and tonight, she would know. As she wandered to the bus stop, she considered what was missing. She definitely felt the absence of something, but even gazing out into the city lights gave her no clues.



The bus came just a few minutes later, devoid of any other people, save the driver. This wasn’t unusual; it was late, and nobody really had any reason to go to the city at this hour. Nobody except Azul, even if the reason for that was still unknown. She sat down, and the bus drove away from everything she knew. The streetlights became a blur, as did her thoughts, but there was one feeling Azul was sure about: she felt as though she were homebound, even as her home faded out of view.



Before she knew it, the bus rumbled to a stop. The doors opened, and Azul stepped out into an unfamiliar place. She had never been so far from home. It was still quiet as ever; after all, she hadn’t even entered the city yet. She somehow knew the way from here, though. The skyline continued to call her, guiding her towards it. The bus had stopped taking the route to the city hours ago; thankfully, the subway was still a destination on its night route, though she couldn’t remember telling the bus driver to stop there. She would have to ask him about that when she returned. With only a brief moment of hesitation, she stepped on the escalator and slowly slipped underground.




The subway was completely empty when Azul boarded. After a few minutes, the doors slid shut behind her, the lights dimmed, and the subway rumbled down the tracks. In the soft blue light, Azul took the time to think about what was happening. It was the middle of the night, and here she was, alone on the subway, heading towards an unfamiliar city. Why was so far from home, with no idea why she was leaving? She had only questions.



As soon as she stepped off the subway and into the station, Azul knew. She was running away from something. She felt alone, fearful, but ultimately, guilty. What had she done? Why was she running? The reason seemed to be just out of reach, as if she was trying to remember a dream. Azul mustered her courage, and ascended the stairs that led out of the station and into the city.



Azul stepped out into the fog-filled streets of the city. Neon lights flashed and danced all around her, and there were a few stray people on the sidewalk, even at this hour. They paid no attention to her, as if she wasn’t there at all. Azul began to wander down the sidewalk, her lungs filled with the damp air. This was all so strange to her. There had been many a night that she would gaze out at the skyline, but she had never been in its midst before. Not until now, anyway.



The calling of the skyline was more insistent now, seeming to come from wherever she looked. She remembered a face now; it was of a man, young and terrified. He seemed familiar, but the details escaped her. Azul sighed, discouraged. The skyscrapers around her rose into the dark clouded sky, as if watching over her. Their directions had ceased, though; she was lost.



As if by chance, a car pulled up to her, rolling down its window. The man inside looked concerned. “Hey.. are you alright? Do you need a ride?” Azul blinked, surprised that someone would just give her a ride. Then again, she had to look out of place. A young girl, wandering down the street in her night clothes. She nodded, and the man unlocked the car doors to let her in. “Do you have a place in mind, miss?” He asked, looking in his rear-view mirror at her. Azul shook her head. She had no idea where to go next. All she did know was that this situation felt painfully familiar.



The man sighed softly, driving down the road once more. “I suppose I’ll take you to the nearest hotel, if you’ve got nowhere to be. Is that alright with you?” Azul hardly heard him, though; she remembered. That terrified face... it belonged to her friend, Dormir. She had failed him. It was a crash. She remembered the car finally coming to a stop, everything hurting. She remembered trying to pull him out, even as flames obscured her vision. She remembered blaming herself for everything.



Azul laid in the hotel room, feeling numb. It had been her fault. She had let him die. If only she had been braver. She wanted to sleep, but her mind was racing, every thought a blur. Azul rose, finding her way to the window and gazing out over the city. The skyline still whispered to her, telling her that something was still missing, and whatever that was, it wasn’t Dormir. “Leave me alone,” she whispered back.



The skyline became silent, leaving Azul alone with her thoughts. She could have saved him, if only she had stayed with him. The more she thought about it, though, the more she realized it was impossible. If she had stayed, she would probably have died. Dormir would be in the same position she was in.. but at least he would be alive. “No,” Azul whispered. “I couldn’t do that do him.” She was feeling so guilty, but who knew how guilty Dormir would feel? It wasn’t right to blame herself. “Try again,” the skyline whispered.



Azul stepped out onto the balcony, the dawn near. She knew what was missing now. It was okay to feel sad, and maybe even guilty, but she knew that Dormir would never want her to blame herself. It wasn’t her fault. She didn’t let him die, not as long as she remembered him. She let out a long, shaky breath, and finally said what was missing. “I forgive myself.” Then Azul woke up.



Azul opened her eyes. She was in her apartment, the light of dawn streaming in through the windows. The clock read 6:04 AM; she had been dreaming. The weight of guilt was gone, though. She felt... okay. She didn’t blame herself anymore. As soon as the clock hit 6:30, Azul tiptoed down the stairs to make some breakfast. It felt like forever since she had eaten. With each passing minute, she realized that life would go on. She would be okay. The sun would rise, and she would try again. Azul had woken up.