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The story of shane and georgia
One day georgia woke up and went on planet minecraft she desided to join a server she met someone and asked if they would be her boy friend he said "Yes" then we went and choped down trees when i was choping down a tree he hit me and then killed me then i wispered to him saying "Why?" he siad "Your dump i already have a girl friend" then i set off to find a a real nice boy friend then a boy sayed in chat "I need a girl friend" i said "I will be your girl friend we set off then another boy came along and kept killing him he forced me to be to be his girl friend so i said "yes wile crying" then we had one son enda5555 and then my bf that forced me got ban i so i was free then i took enda with me and setof to find a bf i sat down and then two boys came along one named shane and the other named sexyn then shane came and sat with me i and i asked him "do you like me" he said "Why yes" i said "no i mean like like me" he siad "ummm sure" he siad "oh eh :(" i said "i could date you and see if i like you more" he siad "Ok :)" we sarted to date he gave me lots and lots of roses then i started to fall in love and that night we kisses.
see you at part 2
by bro10
One day georgia woke up and went on planet minecraft she desided to join a server she met someone and asked if they would be her boy friend he said "Yes" then we went and choped down trees when i was choping down a tree he hit me and then killed me then i wispered to him saying "Why?" he siad "Your dump i already have a girl friend" then i set off to find a a real nice boy friend then a boy sayed in chat "I need a girl friend" i said "I will be your girl friend we set off then another boy came along and kept killing him he forced me to be to be his girl friend so i said "yes wile crying" then we had one son enda5555 and then my bf that forced me got ban i so i was free then i took enda with me and setof to find a bf i sat down and then two boys came along one named shane and the other named sexyn then shane came and sat with me i and i asked him "do you like me" he said "Why yes" i said "no i mean like like me" he siad "ummm sure" he siad "oh eh :(" i said "i could date you and see if i like you more" he siad "Ok :)" we sarted to date he gave me lots and lots of roses then i started to fall in love and that night we kisses.
see you at part 2
by bro10
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guessing owner didn't want me on his server.
Anyway people do not be a idiot and keep making fun of people cause they got a in game gf. its just god dam roleplaying.
CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM
Well it was kindof short actually, i dont believe you when you said [True love story] because who would name their child enda5555? (that was a joke lols). Story is a bit odd also. I guess what you could work on is a few more adjectives, fix your spelling and grammar mistakes (beekos a litel pat of me dyes wen i se spelig an gramerr mestaykes).
eg.he gave me lots and lots of roses
He gave me many red, fragrant roses
desided
are you kidding me? XD anyway yeah might want to fix those :)