PLAYER SPAWN: boop. player: Where the damn am i. the game looks boring...I wonder why i payed 20 DOLLARS
for this weird blocky game..

RANDOM VOICE: Hello! And welcoem to minecraft!

Player: Who the CRAP are you and WHERE are you!

RANDOM VOICE: my name Is Mcguide. Notch Programmed me to guide you trough minecraft! AND im invisible

Player: Ok then... But what the hell am i supposed to do!

McGuide:First you have to make shelter: To do that you need blocks.Try breaking some dirt.

Player: Ok..
.
Effects: Blop

Player: OH i am holding dirt. EPIC

Mcguide: good. now you have to break this wood.

Player: Break wood! Dafuq!

Mcguide: Just do it!

Player: Fine...

Effects: 3 seconds later:

Player: HOLY GOD! MY HAND IS BLEEDING SO MUCH

Mcguide: No its not.

Player: Oh. your right! LETS CHOP SOME TREES

Mcguide: Ok hurry up. the night is comming

TO BE CONTINUED!