I suppose you're wondering, "What is lester?" or "Why does lester act the way he does?"
First of all, I've grown to accept the fact that whatever i do, whoever i wrong, will probably either hate me and move on, actually see through my actions or join in the fun. I don't expect you to like me and i don't expect you to care. In fact, i assume you don't care and assume you think i'm just some idiot with a mental complex.

Well, that's actually true. I was told i have Social Anxieties and a chemical imbalance, but i don't actually believe that it's that simple. I believe, that at some point in my youth, something happened that i was not aware of, changed me into a cold hearted sadistic asshole. Now, i bet your wondering "Why don't you change, Lester?". Well, i don't know how nor do i see a point to. This is the most adequate way of coping with my daily life of what i can describe as "constant conflict and hostility." I also go in and out of psychiatrists and medications like you wouldn't believe, which is also maddening.

That's right, i make more of it for others. I've adapted to actually like it, like an abused girlfriend, because... well, it helps him/life and maybe one day he'll actually turn out to be awesome and worth living with, or, it's just the way he is.

"Why don't you kill yourself?"

While that's not a very nice thing to say, it's a question I've asked myself. While life itself presents no reason, not being in it is too scary to even consider and quite frankly, is proabaly not what it's supposed to be.

"Why do you have to ruin other peoples' fun and be a jerk?" (Reffering to TF2 Servers, havn't been on any Minecraft servers)

Well, i can't do it in real life. I'd probably get my ass kicked, or worse. And besides, it's just a frickin game.

"Why is the logo a picture of Zero Two from Kirby 64? He's a demi-god of darkness!" (Refering to TF2 Ego Group)

Yeah, he is. But I've done research into him and he seems to represent depression on an exaggerated scale. He's a being that's completely surrounded by darkness and loneliness that he resolves that the only way to change is to stop people from being happy by any means possible. To him, that means everybody else will be unhappy with him, which will make him less lonely. Also, he's previously been vanquished by "Joy and Positivity" which only made it worse.

Of course, i believe that's not necessary, i'm not alone at all. Though, in my case, changing myself would be like teaching a fish to walk and breathe air, I've adapted to solidly to my surroundings and aggression and anxieties are all i know.