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Twas A Night Before Christmas - A Minecraft Parody

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Undala's Avatar Undala
Level 40 : Master Architect
16
(I wrote this at 2AM this morning, but fell asleep at the computer.)

Twas A Night Before Christmas - A Minecraft Parody
Written by Undala

Twas the night before Christmas, when all through my house
There was nothing to eat, not even some scouse.
I looked out the window, my ribs were all bare,
With hopes that some pig or cow soon would be there.

I would have just slept all snug in a bed,
But no sheep were here, or else they'd be dead.
And therefore no wool, just a worn leather cap,
With me looking desperately at my incomplete map.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I looked out the door to see what was the matter.
Without any warning on my leg was a gash,
No time to double-tap, no time to dash.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Did not provide enough ambient light to kill the mobs below.
And then, the most horrible thing would appear,
From my head to my toes I would tremble with fear.

Whoever made this mob was perverted or sick,
This creature looked like a giant green d***.
I thought that my house would be put to shame,
And then he shouted and called out my name!

"Player, why don't you ever listen?
Haven't you any idea what you're missin'?
Look what you're doing before Christmas, lawl,
Do you have any Christmas spirit at all?"

I took the creeper's advice with a sigh,
And saw that my life was just passing by.
I paused the game, for then I knew,
Exactly what I had to do.

I turned on peaceful and raised up my roof,
I have Christmas spirit, and this would be proof.
With creative mode, no messing around,
No time for all the blocks to be found.

I worked for so long I felt needles in my foot,
For all of these blocks had to be put.
There was nothing this project was going to lack,
I even downloaded a new texture pack.

The colors, the lights, it was all so merry!
My Christmas spirit it surely would carry!
I sat back in awe, no need for a bow,
Peaceful had cleared all the mobs from the snow.

The finishing touch in the room was a wreath,
I smiled so wide, chicken in my teeth,
For I spawned enough chicken to fill up my belly,
Enough cooked beef and pork to open a deli!

I was chubby and plump, as happy as an elf,
And then I was drawn to my RL self!
I'd missed the whole point, what was wrong in my head,
I was supposed to log off and head off to bed.

And then I observed all my beautiful work,
From my bed to the monitor my head would jerk.
The point of all this was right under my nose,
And from my computer chair I certainly rose!

I sprang to my bed faster than a whistle,
And away I flew like a tactical missile.
And I said right before I turned off the light,
"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!"
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1
06/22/2012 6:04 pm
Level 23 : Expert Dragonborn
butchygraham
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Diamond for you!
1
12/19/2011 7:12 pm
Level 1 : New Explorer
AbramsTank
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Thumbs up
1
12/19/2011 5:53 pm
Level 21 : Expert Pony
acs26
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Loved it!
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