Guess who's back :))

being an artist is wanting to see two characters kiss so badly, and then realizing you can just draw it yourself

Alrighty, I'm no longer a moderator. I made a mistake years prior, and it's come back to snatch me down - I won't dive into details, but I understand what's happened, and for anyone who wonders "Why did they step down?", it was an understandable result, with me lacking any way to properly reference or discuss something that happened five years prior, so it's completely reasonable. :) Not that I'm happy, sure, but it's reasonable, and I want that to be absolutely clear. It's been great contributing to the moderation team, and I hope those still present engage happily enough too.

Cyprezz is an excellent owner, and I want it to be known he really does support everyone getting along, mediating tensions, being friendly and such- Trying to (and rather successfully) fostering a community that's diverse and often clashing while still hopefully kind and supportive enough. A respectable, admirable challenge; he just wants everyone to get along, and that's great! I have no regrets from my time as a moderator, bar the fact it's over now - and that is what it is. Most who see this probably didn't see me often nowadays, but if you do know me, hey! It was great working in this position, helping to make the community a little happier along the way, and making my own fair share of accidental errors too (as moderation always has), while trying to overall have a good impact on the site. :) Thanks for the time.

I'm not going anywhere, though - I'll still be here, as a member. Just not moderating!

So, I'll use this opportunity as a bit of inspiration/advice for other people:

• Your actions matter. You may not think it, but a mistake, error, sin, making an enemy of someone- Anything like that has lasting repercussions, which go further than just a single month, week, or even day or hour of your life. Take care, and try to make choices you'll be happy with in the future. When you aren't sure what to do in a situation and all options look to be bad, think about the long term effects it may have on everyone involved. Yourself especially. Look after yourself, and remember that actions you make last.
• Seek peace with people you speak with. Even if you don't like someone much, aim to get along with them if possible. Find ways to ease tensions, to see eye to eye. To make friends, or at least to not be at odd's ends with someone. You may have wildly different views on how life works, or there may even be a major problem at hand, but it's never worth raising tensions with someone to make them an enemy. A huge part of looking after yourself and others is respecting the differences between people. This can be difficult, as a lot of walks of life clash inherently, but if you can find this kind of peace, you're already going to be better off for it.
• Be nice. Self-explanatory, with the other two above: Coldness of any sort can genuinely catch up to you. Try to be a kind person, even while you're still growing and learning. It's difficult, and mistakes will happen along the way, but so long as someone's trying, the mistakes shouldn't be too bad.
• Believe in yourself. Even if things look tough and you're starting to doubt how to move forwards with life, remember that you can still succeed. So long as life is continuing, there's still some hope to make it through and overcome the hurdles you face. Do not let anything take away from that confidence and determination to grow, persevere, and make life your own to be happy with.
• Mistakes happen. That doesn't mean to accept and ignore the weight of the mistakes, but it does mean to remember not to beat yourself up if you do something wrong. Try to mediate tensions with involved people, apologise, see what you can do to recover from the mistake, and overall just keep working to grow as a person. We aren't defined by our mistakes; we are more than just the small parts of what makes us people. Look out for yourselves, and try to accept your errors, while not dragging yourself down with them. They are not the shackles dragging you down; they are just parts of this walk of life. Some will even be pretty bad mistakes, but if life's still ongoing, you can still change, and you can still grow, and there's still hope for you.
• There's always hope. Like the above two points, even when something's still reaching for you after a long time, there's always hope to change and develop. There's always hope to find new friends, new communities, new job opportunities- Nothing is destined to fall apart entirely, purely based on the past. The present and future will be influenced by the past, but your own actions can change and influence them too. You're never hopeless. Never. There's always a future.
• Seek help and advice. This is perhaps the hardest thing to do when so few people know how to make it through their own lives, but the reality is we're all learning and trying to make our own journeys. It isn't easy, and it never will be. There's no-one who fully grasps everything they have in life, yeah? But, you can at least seek to hear what others think about life, comparing it with your own journeys, seeking for support and encouragement to try to make your own life better, and perhaps theirs too in the process. We all have thoughts worth sharing (and thoughts that aren't worth sharing, haha. We're all complex, after all).
• Never stop learning. As said, we'll never be perfect. Always keep trying to grow. I can't promise it'll matter in some situations, as sometimes regardless of how much you've done you'll still get into problems based on a lesser-capable version of you's choices, however you should still always try to grow, because while some situations are dead-ended, it will open the door to potential options which aren't. There's hope for you. For everyone. It may feel hard to find right now, but in this society, there's no point where someone has no possible way to hope, to care for themself, to hold up a job, friends, a community- There's always hope. Keep growing, keep taking care, and keep trying to work forwards with life.

There's a bit more I think I'd be interested in rambling about, but this is already quite long and the post is partly motivation for myself, and ideally, motivation for others too. :) Life's tough, but there's always a path forwards. Don't let the complexities of this world make you feel helpless; you can always grow.
Even if it feels really tough.

Take care. :)

Always seek to take care.

You may not know what for, but future you may well thank you for doing it. :)

psst wsst, lacuna is close to 600 subs!! <33
let's boost it a bit >:)

/srs post

the other day i noticed my good friend Trib [@/BlueBoyBuilds] was five subscribers away from having five hundred, which is an incredible milestone that i wanted him to reach. so naturally i made a wallpost calling people to subscribe. it would only take the kindness of five people, and since most people hand out subs like theyre nothing i figured it wouldnt take too long.

at first it looked promising. ppl kept sharing, trib noticed, and by two days he had two more subs, which was great!

i checked in the third day and someone unsubscribed. that was disappointing, but it happens all the time- usually just one person deciding to be a jerk- and its often just fixed by someone else.

i checked back in today to discover he had gone from four hundred and ninety seven to four hundred and eighty eight.

THIS IS NOT OKAY.

i dont care who you are. i dont care if you resub. i dont care if you personally attack me and/or trib [​though i will report you]. i dont care if you think you have a good reason and, if thats the case, you could have sucked it up for at least until he had five hundred subs.

what i do care about is that you realize this was an incredibly douchey and jerk move and you should probably apologize, even if its anonymously in his secret share box [​if he still has it]. i doubt either of us care if you resub.

you know who you are. this was not acceptable.

/end /srs post

wow guys so i had a worse day than i expected

Alright I need an explanation:

who did this lol

/srs post

the other day i noticed my good friend Trib [@/BlueBoyBuilds] was five subscribers away from having five hundred, which is an incredible milestone that i wanted him to reach. so naturally i made a wallpost calling people to subscribe. it would only take the kindness of five people, and since most people hand out subs like theyre nothing i figured it wouldnt take too long.

at first it looked promising. ppl kept sharing, trib noticed, and by two days he had two more subs, which was great!

i checked in the third day and someone unsubscribed. that was disappointing, but it happens all the time- usually just one person deciding to be a jerk- and its often just fixed by someone else.

i checked back in today to discover he had gone from four hundred and ninety seven to four hundred and eighty eight.

THIS IS NOT OKAY.

i dont care who you are. i dont care if you resub. i dont care if you personally attack me and/or trib [​though i will report you]. i dont care if you think you have a good reason and, if thats the case, you could have sucked it up for at least until he had five hundred subs.

what i do care about is that you realize this was an incredibly douchey and jerk move and you should probably apologize, even if its anonymously in his secret share box [​if he still has it]. i doubt either of us care if you resub.

you know who you are. this was not acceptable.

/end /srs post

wow guys so i had a worse day than i expected

which means i dont care what people think of me anymore which also means I HAVE MY CONFIDENCE BACK!!!
THATS RIGHT THE OLD TZYBER IS BACK!!!

it took losing someone close to me to realize theyre not the only one who loves and cares about me
there are so many people who care about me and my wellbeing and would be sad if i disappeared. way more than the people who dont and that makes me so happy. im not alone

i want to thank each and every one of you who talks to me even a little bit, you make a big difference and i love you all so much

i love myself now because of you

btw its bpd awareness month shoutout to fellow Strugglers