I feel this with a lot of things, actually. Most things I do.
Let's start with the Minecraft Based version.
Pixelmon Project
I've been working on this project for the past
4-5 years now and I keep getting
more and more proud of it. Yet, I feel like, even though it does get quite a bit of traction, that it still
isn't quite up to par with what I would hope. And sure, it's not released yet and that would make the biggest impact ofcourse. However it would give a lot
more motivation to have people
actually notice it and give it some hype/love, so I can
feel good about it again. I've been
on/off on this project so many times now just because
I can get really into it or I can just be
sick of it for months on end, leaving me with a really hard time to get back into it as it's
such a big project.
The project I'm talking about is my
Pixelmon Kainite project, A
Minecraft Adventure Map made for the
Pixelmon mod, It is it's own Region and plays out like a
full on Pokemon Game. With
Badges to collect,
a story to follow and
every Pokemon up until gen 8 can be found within. Special
events and a full on
OST, literally just
a Pokemon Game within Minecraft.
All links to the media are linked here:
Forum YoutubeDiscord I've made a map like this once before, it got
quite some attention and that made me to make this map, wanting it to make it
the best I could, where
the previous one was really
rushed and plain, hard to get through as it was just boring, really. So I wanted this to redeem all the mistakes the old one had, and make it something I was genuinely proud to present. But as stated before, I sometimes
lack motivation as I feel like it's just
not getting enough attention for all the effort I've put in so far.
I've made several
teaser video's and
trailers on a separate channel purely made to present this and maybe future maps. I've put a lot of effort into those too, some more than others, and you can see big improvements throughout them all too, and where they do get some views that I can be happy with, I still only got
32 subs from it and I just wished that would be a bit more too, so I could actually use that channel to
promote it instead of just having it there to link it in different places.
I've also really tried to promote the
Discord server as that's become my main way of
showing progress and teasers of the project and it does have quite some members in it after all this time but it's
really inactive, most of the accounts are dead accounts (no longer in use), and
people come and go. I'd love for people to speculate a bit as I do like to tease things a lot without context, to see if people can lay links between them but that's me asking a lot of people that just check for something to play.
I do
really appreciate all the nice comments and
overwhelmingly positive feedback I have gotten over these years but it's
very minimal, they do still keep me going, however. I really want this project to be done as soon as possible as it's already been in the works for so long, it's just hard at times.
YouTube
Since 2010 I've started making Video's on YouTube. And I completely get that I didn't get many views or subs at all in the first 5 years as it was REALLY BAD, but since 2016 I feel like I've actually started making much more interesting video's, while still Dutch at first I've started making English content since 2017, and never got much recognition of it. I used to make all sorts of content which I later understood was hard for people to watch as they mostly come for one game each, so I later just based my entire channel off of Dead by Daylight, the game I've played most by far in the past 4 years.To make things so much worse, I had made a few memes a few years back who got a lot of attention (650k-200k views each), which got me a lot of subs too but they all immediately unsub as soon as they see my channel isn't actually based on memes so my statistics really went down the drain for so long, making it really hard for me to even be recommended to others. I really started to make proper video's in around 2018-2019 where I put in all my effort to make video's I actually enjoyed myself. But seeing as how it got no real attention I kind of backed out from making anything, with a total of 2 videos in the entirety of 2020. A shit ton of backed up clips to work with, but just not knowing what to do with them. Waiting so long till the clips are literally irrelevant and just getting so lost and demotivated in what to do, stressing out about that while also completely giving up. I really enjoy editing, or at least I did. I can't really say that now as I haven't touched anything in so long. It's been rough for so long and I just kind of gave up? I still look at my channel every so often and just notice more unsubs and it just drains my motivation more and more, and I get that people unsub because I don't upload but with every upload I make I just lose more subs than I gain. Putting in hours of work for about 50 average views and a few unsubs.Here's a link to the channel:YouTubeTwitch
I've recently started streaming, which was originally meant for just to be something on the side of making videos, though it went so well at first, I realy enjoyed it and almost streamed nearly daily. Got affiliate pretty quickly too. I just struggle alot lately, after I hit 100 followers I haven't really gained any, and that's about 2 months ago now. Every stream I do I barely get any new viewers, I have some active viewers and I treasure those a lot but it would ofcourse be nice to see some more people instead of just playing for the same 2-3 people. And not to be rude or anything but, some viewers I have are just not really the ones you can hold a conversation with for hours on end, and sometimes they are just the only ones there and it's just not as fun. I tried switching up the game too, though it was a singleplayer game and there's no real people in game you meet that could possibly come watch, I did actually get a decent amount of viewers, much more than my average stream, but none of them talked in chat, which is about the same as having no viewers in my mind. Might as well be a bugged number, right? I haven't streamed much in the past 2 weeks, if at all as I just had a hard time getting back into it after a few "bad" streams, but I'll still stream every so often.Here's the link to my Channel, would love to see some more people pop in sometime.Twitch
