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Hey guys, this is my first short story on PMC. I hope you like it. :)
It's called Alone.
It was the first day of summer, and I was about to go outside for a walk. I smelt a smell in the kitchen. It was the smell of bacon cooking. I couldn't not eat bacon. I ran in to the kitchen, to see my mom cooking some breakfast.
"Morning honey!" she said.
"Morning mom.," I replied tiredly. "Are you okay honey? You sound sick.." my mom said.
"Oh, I'm fine, just really tired.," I said.
"Okay then, come try some of these strawberry chocolate chip pancakes!" my mom said cheerily.
"Well, I was thinking about going on a walk, but I guess I can do that after.," I replied.
I ate fast, and then told my mom I was going on the walk.
Everything was so beautiful where I lived. It wasn't busy with traffic, because I lived on a nice mountain in a forest. Flowers had bloomed from spring, and animals were out. I saw a few cute bunnies, and some deer with fawns.
I walked a little deeper in to the forest, when I realized I couldn't see where I was going. It was foggy, and the trees were blocking most of the sunlight.
I didn't see any birds, or deer, or bunnies anymore. I was completely alone.
I was scared. The trees I touched felt weird, kind of slimy. It was gross.
I felt stone. It must have been a cave! Would there bears in there though? I didn't think so. I felt my hands along the grounds as I look for a rock and stick. I had gone to camp a week earlier, so I knew how to start a fire.
I found a rock and stick and made a fire. it was small, but it still gave some light. I didn't know how long I had been out there, but I felt tired. I tried to stay awake, but I soon fell asleep.
It felt like a second, but I did sleep. I had awoken from a noise. I heard a growling to the side of the cave. I slowly looked over. What I saw there was terrifying. I saw a huge bear.
It launched itself toward me. I could feel it digging in to my skin. I screamed and cried. I couldn't escape from this.
I was alone. I screamed so loud I knew the whole mountain could hear me. It was my last scream, and my last word. "I'm alone." I whispered.
I was alone, and dead.
I hope you all liked my story! Here is the description part of the characters.
The Girl
Age: 13
Name: Ciara
Mom
Age: 53
Name: Lindsey
It's called Alone.
It was the first day of summer, and I was about to go outside for a walk. I smelt a smell in the kitchen. It was the smell of bacon cooking. I couldn't not eat bacon. I ran in to the kitchen, to see my mom cooking some breakfast.
"Morning honey!" she said.
"Morning mom.," I replied tiredly. "Are you okay honey? You sound sick.." my mom said.
"Oh, I'm fine, just really tired.," I said.
"Okay then, come try some of these strawberry chocolate chip pancakes!" my mom said cheerily.
"Well, I was thinking about going on a walk, but I guess I can do that after.," I replied.
I ate fast, and then told my mom I was going on the walk.
Everything was so beautiful where I lived. It wasn't busy with traffic, because I lived on a nice mountain in a forest. Flowers had bloomed from spring, and animals were out. I saw a few cute bunnies, and some deer with fawns.
I walked a little deeper in to the forest, when I realized I couldn't see where I was going. It was foggy, and the trees were blocking most of the sunlight.
I didn't see any birds, or deer, or bunnies anymore. I was completely alone.
I was scared. The trees I touched felt weird, kind of slimy. It was gross.
I felt stone. It must have been a cave! Would there bears in there though? I didn't think so. I felt my hands along the grounds as I look for a rock and stick. I had gone to camp a week earlier, so I knew how to start a fire.
I found a rock and stick and made a fire. it was small, but it still gave some light. I didn't know how long I had been out there, but I felt tired. I tried to stay awake, but I soon fell asleep.
It felt like a second, but I did sleep. I had awoken from a noise. I heard a growling to the side of the cave. I slowly looked over. What I saw there was terrifying. I saw a huge bear.
It launched itself toward me. I could feel it digging in to my skin. I screamed and cried. I couldn't escape from this.
I was alone. I screamed so loud I knew the whole mountain could hear me. It was my last scream, and my last word. "I'm alone." I whispered.
I was alone, and dead.
I hope you all liked my story! Here is the description part of the characters.
The Girl
Age: 13
Name: Ciara
Mom
Age: 53
Name: Lindsey
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It feels detailed... then it just STOPS, with that period you should use ; <--- those
Just to improve your story making :)