Need A Mod!

Hello i would like a mod made; this mod will probobly include SO much nobody will try. Anyways, here is the stuff that I would like. May want more mods so I might post a simpler one... also it includes so much you will have to replace minecraft.jar!
Please add:
+Swinging doors
+wind
+shadows
+NPC villagers look like the player
+swinging levers
+zombies can break down the following: Fences, Fence Gates, Glass (Block and pane)
+Randomly spawning challenges
+Randomly spawning volcanoes(erupt and place lava EVERYWHERE)
+tumbleweeds that roll
+when you sleep you go UNDER the covers
+Killing the villager's king will force them to give stuff to you (butcher will give meat; books from librarian; tools from blacksmith)
+alligaters(Spawn in swamp)
+Jellyfish (Glow and shock you)
+fish
+birds
+Fire dragon in the nether
+Dragons (can be tamed with steak)
+Knives
+Wives
+Having sex with your wife will spawn a baby/child (right click to name)
+Your child can get diabetes (Type 1)
+Black Holes (Sucks blocks up unless you placed it)
I know this is stuff from smartmoving
+You swim, not bob
+Crawling
+Dancing
+Radio
+Wireless redstone
+Vertical redstone
+(Iron and Snow) Golems will love you!
+Punching a cow with red eyes will spawn a stampede; which is a bunch of cows that charge to you (They hurt and launch you into the air)
+Trampolines
+Swinging fence gates
+Swinging trapdoors


That's it! Call it the "Real Life Mod"


Now WHO IS UP TO THE CHALLENGE???!!!!