You are doing very well!
I think the best thing your video has is recording equipment. Your microphone is high quality and the video has relatively stable frame rate.
Some points of improvement could come from you editing your videos. If you by chance have or get access to any editing software, whether it is free or not, you should use it to add music to your videos. In quite a lot of cases, video games with their normal background music is overplayed and lacking in ways that are hard to explain. You could also try cutting your video so that you can remove the pauses you take while speaking. You have a good voice tone, but it can always be improved. I cannot give advice on how to improve it; so just try to experiment.
Good luck!
