9
Curtains shut on a frigid night
Oh, how comfortable there I sat
Oh, how comfortable there I sat
Contented on a wintery eve
While the dog next door was fighting with the cat.
Front room was aglow
A comforting air just for me
At long last I could put my feet up
While the dog next door was fighting with the cat.
Front room was aglow
A comforting air just for me
At long last I could put my feet up
And hope Anne Hegarty didn't choose C.
There my very being fermented
I had nothing else to ponder
Actually, tell a lie, I did have
A burning issue that let my mind wander.
It was a problem never abated
And I had to think what could
Fill the negative space in my soul
That something like a pet would.
It soon came time for me to sleep
The puzzle was forced to a backburner
But my cuddly toys were dreading it
Because in my bed I was a toss-and-turner.
I woke up with a jolly start
My limbs messily sprawled across the sheets
I got ready to face my busy day:
reading mountains upon mountains of tweets.
The day was a Sunday
The so-called day of rest
So at least the handsy pawnbroker
Wasn't feeling up anyone's chest.
The clouds were still
I hadn't been out in a good long while
So I dressed up and headed out
I only prepared to walk a mile!
It was nearing the end of my trip
And I thought I'd quickly nip down to Asda
But little did I know I'd meet someone there
Who'd make my heart beat faster.
He worked as a shelf-stacker
Sorting beans from tinned tomatoes
Suddenly I had a feeling I couldn't shake
From the crown on my head to my toes.
I know it sounds lame, but it's so true
And I thought it would be prudent
To ask him where the Oxo cubes were
Like a teacher asks a student.
He responded with dignity and confidence
And spoke with a certain timbre
He wasn't like those other guys
Who spoke like a foghorn near a harbour.
The day was a Sunday
The so-called day of rest
So at least the handsy pawnbroker
Wasn't feeling up anyone's chest.
The clouds were still
I hadn't been out in a good long while
So I dressed up and headed out
I only prepared to walk a mile!
It was nearing the end of my trip
And I thought I'd quickly nip down to Asda
But little did I know I'd meet someone there
Who'd make my heart beat faster.
He worked as a shelf-stacker
Sorting beans from tinned tomatoes
Suddenly I had a feeling I couldn't shake
From the crown on my head to my toes.
I know it sounds lame, but it's so true
And I thought it would be prudent
To ask him where the Oxo cubes were
Like a teacher asks a student.
He responded with dignity and confidence
And spoke with a certain timbre
He wasn't like those other guys
Who spoke like a foghorn near a harbour.
I followed his direction without delay
But certainly not before thanking him
I was on my way to aisle twelve
Relieved I had followed the whim.
Near the end of my shop I headed to the till
And guess who I was to see?
But certainly not before thanking him
I was on my way to aisle twelve
Relieved I had followed the whim.
Near the end of my shop I headed to the till
And guess who I was to see?
The charming man who had helped me out
From way below on one knee.
As I was just checking out, he spotted me again
He gave a wave, and I returned it
We chatted for ages on a nearby bench
He told me what his favourite band was and if I heard it.
Turns out I overstayed my welcome
And as the sun dropped behind the roads
He asked if I wanted to meet again on his day off
Delighted, I said yes and carried my 3 bags home.
His day off soon came and I was over the moon
From way below on one knee.
As I was just checking out, he spotted me again
He gave a wave, and I returned it
We chatted for ages on a nearby bench
He told me what his favourite band was and if I heard it.
Turns out I overstayed my welcome
And as the sun dropped behind the roads
He asked if I wanted to meet again on his day off
Delighted, I said yes and carried my 3 bags home.
His day off soon came and I was over the moon
Someone to lift me from my everyday
But there was a certain qualm I had up there
That he'd want to know me every which way.
I dressed for my best and sat on the lawns
Plenty of people for watching
Amidst all the fun-runners and carnival-goers
Were kids' face painters doing colour-swatching.
10 minutes had gone by with no sign of him whatsoever
Perhaps I was just really, really early?
But there was a certain qualm I had up there
That he'd want to know me every which way.
I dressed for my best and sat on the lawns
Plenty of people for watching
Amidst all the fun-runners and carnival-goers
Were kids' face painters doing colour-swatching.
10 minutes had gone by with no sign of him whatsoever
Perhaps I was just really, really early?
Or maybe he stood me up, but before long came the right man
Hurrying for me and yelling, his hair blond and curly.
I asked what took him so long, not wanting to be rude
Clearly he'd put effort in too
He explained why and I forgave him
Because, you know, his face to me was relatively new.
The man took a seat next to me on the grass,
He decided to rock up in a Korn shirt and jeans
Just my lucky day, I suppose.
I was wearing a pastel-yellow polo-shirt and khakis
(Both with multicoloured seams).
Regardless, we got on
We chummed up at a record pace
But something kept stirring inside me
every time I looked at his face.
It wasn't bodily fluids, get your mind out the gutter.
We laughed and joked about our home lives
On the verdant, steep hill
I wanted to tell him something, but was interrupted
by a street vendor, I can't remember what on earth he had to shill.
Hurrying for me and yelling, his hair blond and curly.
I asked what took him so long, not wanting to be rude
Clearly he'd put effort in too
He explained why and I forgave him
Because, you know, his face to me was relatively new.
The man took a seat next to me on the grass,
He decided to rock up in a Korn shirt and jeans
Just my lucky day, I suppose.
I was wearing a pastel-yellow polo-shirt and khakis
(Both with multicoloured seams).
Regardless, we got on
We chummed up at a record pace
But something kept stirring inside me
every time I looked at his face.
It wasn't bodily fluids, get your mind out the gutter.
We laughed and joked about our home lives
On the verdant, steep hill
I wanted to tell him something, but was interrupted
by a street vendor, I can't remember what on earth he had to shill.
We kindly told him to sod off:
"No, sorry, we haven't the time."
"No, sorry, we haven't the time."
Regardless we continued chatting
Until in the distance I heard a slight chime.
It was a notice from a tannoy
Asking everyone to finish what they were doing and vacate
So we packed and I waved him goodbye in the sundrenched hues
Until I yelled out an urgent 'Wait!'
He turned round, a look of sheepish confusion
Until in the distance I heard a slight chime.
It was a notice from a tannoy
Asking everyone to finish what they were doing and vacate
So we packed and I waved him goodbye in the sundrenched hues
Until I yelled out an urgent 'Wait!'
He turned round, a look of sheepish confusion
I held in my butterflies
And slowly asked him for his number
Oddly enough, he wasn't surprised.
He complied and wrote the full 11 digits
I never questioned the breakneck speed
Soon, I got handed the little slip of numbers, thinking
'God, this is gonna be painful to read...'
So, when I got home, I keyed in the sequence
A rambunctious, hyped feeling in my gut
And slowly asked him for his number
Oddly enough, he wasn't surprised.
He complied and wrote the full 11 digits
I never questioned the breakneck speed
Soon, I got handed the little slip of numbers, thinking
'God, this is gonna be painful to read...'
So, when I got home, I keyed in the sequence
A rambunctious, hyped feeling in my gut
I let the phone ring on for a while
Until the other person began with 'Welcome to Pizza Hut!'
Admittedly, I was in two minds at that point
One was screaming to end the friendship there and then
But the other just wanted to laugh at the joke
So I did, and at the overall stupidity of us men.
Luckily, he did know the shelf-stacker's real number
Admittedly, I was in two minds at that point
One was screaming to end the friendship there and then
But the other just wanted to laugh at the joke
So I did, and at the overall stupidity of us men.
Luckily, he did know the shelf-stacker's real number
And I rang him that same night
I playfully chastised him down the blower
And set that cheekiness right!
I playfully chastised him down the blower
And set that cheekiness right!
We had an amazing conversation
My admiration growing by the minute
There was just something about that guy
But I was seriously struggling to pin it.
We met up again and again
At a variety of locations
But only to small-end places and shops on the high street
My admiration growing by the minute
There was just something about that guy
But I was seriously struggling to pin it.
We met up again and again
At a variety of locations
But only to small-end places and shops on the high street
I couldn't wait for summer vacations!
At last, it was coming up the rear end of July
Beaches, sand, sea and sun
I invited round my long-time friend
To see if he wanted to have some fun.
We rocked up on the beach, it was nearly deserted
We had a race to see who could finish our ice-creams first
I won by an absolute landslide
'Cos I bite my ice-cream in one big burst.
Beaches, sand, sea and sun
I invited round my long-time friend
To see if he wanted to have some fun.
We rocked up on the beach, it was nearly deserted
We had a race to see who could finish our ice-creams first
I won by an absolute landslide
'Cos I bite my ice-cream in one big burst.
(The brainfreeze was an utter nightmare, though)
We sat and watched the fish for ages
Dipping our toes between the sea foam
But right next beside this bloke,
I just somehow felt more at home.
My emotions were at an all-time high
When normally they were pretty low,
But before I could get a word in edgeways,
He said there's something I should know.
He opened his mouth and out poured his feelings
That for so long I could tell he wanted to mask
He asked if we could be boyfriend and boyfriend
And he made it sound like a Heraklean task.
I was actually quite gobsmacked
For so long it felt like my feelings went unshared
I agreed, giggling and laughing confidently
Knowing that he cared.
I asked him why he didn't tell me sooner
If he knew I felt the same
He told me it was because of his upbringing
And how his God-fearing parents dealt him shame.
As an instinct, I leapt in for a hug
Out of sympathy among other things
Reluctantly, he did soon join in on it
The sun joining in too, wrapping our skins.
I looked up into his eyes, blue like the sea
As he gazed longingly into mine
We kissed passionately on the rocks for the first time
Karens everywhere averting their kids' eyes.
I knew that he had to be the one
From that moment on
Any doubt in my mind
Were suddenly... *plip!* gone.
The seasons came one after the other
We grew up as a happy couple
Apparently after dark however,
He'd soon come to learn I was supple.
Who really cares who you love, in all honesty
But right next beside this bloke,
I just somehow felt more at home.
My emotions were at an all-time high
When normally they were pretty low,
But before I could get a word in edgeways,
He said there's something I should know.
He opened his mouth and out poured his feelings
That for so long I could tell he wanted to mask
He asked if we could be boyfriend and boyfriend
And he made it sound like a Heraklean task.
I was actually quite gobsmacked
For so long it felt like my feelings went unshared
I agreed, giggling and laughing confidently
Knowing that he cared.
I asked him why he didn't tell me sooner
If he knew I felt the same
He told me it was because of his upbringing
And how his God-fearing parents dealt him shame.
As an instinct, I leapt in for a hug
Out of sympathy among other things
Reluctantly, he did soon join in on it
The sun joining in too, wrapping our skins.
I looked up into his eyes, blue like the sea
As he gazed longingly into mine
We kissed passionately on the rocks for the first time
Karens everywhere averting their kids' eyes.
I knew that he had to be the one
From that moment on
Any doubt in my mind
Were suddenly... *plip!* gone.
The seasons came one after the other
We grew up as a happy couple
Apparently after dark however,
He'd soon come to learn I was supple.
Who really cares who you love, in all honesty
I mean, you can't really be hurting anybody
As long as both of you are satisfied
And your therapist doesn't describe your housework skills as shoddy.
You know, I'm glad I met him
Almost thirty years ago
Else I'd still be in my front room
With no lights aglow.
I bet he's thankful for that day as well, you know
We can talk about things, laugh, joke, cry with ease
As long as both of you are satisfied
And your therapist doesn't describe your housework skills as shoddy.
You know, I'm glad I met him
Almost thirty years ago
Else I'd still be in my front room
With no lights aglow.
I bet he's thankful for that day as well, you know
We can talk about things, laugh, joke, cry with ease
And that was purely all down to
Me following the ever-so-slightest breeze.
Me following the ever-so-slightest breeze.
| Credit | The title of the work was actually inspired by a song by the late comedienne Victoria Wood, 'Go With It', you can listen to it here alongside the poem if you want: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5rpTM9eW_AQ |
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I don't know how else to describe it <333