Published Dec 14th, 2016, 12/14/16 5:32 pm
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So... two contests in a row. This is rather ambitious of me XD However, I'm not really going for a win this time. I'm entering later than I'd like, so I probably won't get enough diamonds and views to even make finalists. But I'm posting anyway, I guess mostly just felt like there was something I needed to say. And yes, I know this is a lot simpler than my usual style and the shading looks like I didn't really try because I didn't. >_<
Pls leave a diamond/favorite if you like and subscribe for more! And as always, honest feedback is welcome and appreciated.
- Story - (Skin information at the bottom)
Ok, before I begin, I'd just like to say I expect not everyone who reads this will relate to it. If you don't get what I'm saying or think it's stupid, fine, I can't change your opinion, but please don't hate in the comments or anything. Even if you just don't understand what I'm talking about please do understand that this is a very important and emotional thing for me and I hope you can respect that regardless of your opinion.
When I was a lot younger, maybe 6 or 7 years old or so, I started taking ballet classes at this one dance studio nearby, I've always loved dancing, and I really enjoyed taking classes there. At some point I learned that the studio did a production of the ballet The Nutcracker every year around Christmas. My favorite part of dancing was getting to perform onstage, so I signed up.
I kinda hoped I'd get the part of Clara, the lead role, but since it was my first time in the show, of course I didn't. But nonetheless, I had a great time and decided to do it again the next year. When the next year came around, I again hoped I'd get picked to be Clara. It still didn't happen. Of course, I was only one in a fairly large crowd of young dancers wanting that special opportunity so it's not really that surprising that I didn't get the part. The next year I tried again. I still didn't get it. But I kept wishing I would.
It wasn't that I wanted to be Clara simply because it was the main role, I wanted it because it meant something deeper to me. The story of The Nutcracker has always seemed magical to me somehow. Even now it's still is a big part of who I am. I wanted to be a bigger part of that magic and be able to bring it to other people.
I don't think the reason I didn't get the role was due to any lack of skill. I don't mean to boast, but I was one of the better dancers of my age group and level. However, the studio tended to cast shorter people as Clara so they'd look more like a younger girl. I've always been on the tall side. I'd hate to think my height was the only thing keeping me out of the role, and it probably wasn't the only reason, but I know it was a key factor.
Then, as time went on, I began to realize that I wasn't enjoying dancing at the studio as much as I did when I'd first joined. The classes were tedious, my favorite teachers were no longer available, and I was getting older and taller and the chance of getting the part of Clara became smaller each year. I decided to quit ballet. At first it was a relief not to have to drag myself out the door three times a week for something I didn't enjoy, but I still missed it.
As the years went by there was a while when I didn't really think about it that much, but then I began realizing just how much I did wish I could go back and pick up where I left off. But by then it was too late. I'd already lost a lot of my skill from not dancing for a few years, too much to be able to drop back in where I'd left. It was terrible realizing I couldn't just go right back to where I was. When I'd quit before I'd never intended to quit permanently, I just thought I'd take a year, maybe two, to catch my breath before continuing on. But then one year had turned to two, then three, then four or five. Now I couldn't believe I probably let any chance of returning to the life I'd known for years slip out the window.
These days I still haven't yet found a way to get back the life I left behind. But every year at Christmastime I remember it all. The joy I felt when I first started dancing at that studio and when I stepped onstage, even just in the background, to perform for the audience and be a part of something bigger. The pain of losing it all in a decision made to help myself recover from being stressed out that then resulted in shutting a door I'd meant to leave open before I'd even realized it. It adds a bittersweet tinge to the otherwise cheerful Christmas festivities. Because even after all these years, the one thing I want most for Christmas, more than any of the presents under the tree, is a chance to do the one thing I'd always wanted to do, the one thing I never got to do - a chance to perform as Clara in The Nutcracker.
I try not to think about it all too hard. Because I know if I do I will inevitably arrive at the conclusion that there's no way for this dream to come true. It's been years since I actually danced ballet and while many of the dance teachers know and remember be well, they aren't just going to hand me the role, especially with my rusty skills. But even so, I keep wishing for it to happen. Hoping that one day one of these years I just might be able to step back into the spotlight and experience the magic I've dreamed about my whole life. Because even after all this time I still love dancing and want to go back to that dance studio and wish I could have a chance - just one chance - to get to be Clara.
for some reason I cry every time I hear this song ;-;
Anyhow so yeah... long story short all I want for Christmas is a chance to get to perform as Clara in The Nutcracker. Which will probably never happen despite my constant hoping and wishing that it will. The skin is of me wearing the costume I'd like to get to wear if I somehow ever did get to dance as Clara.
So yeah, I hope you like it even though it's really simple compared to my usual skins.
When I was a lot younger, maybe 6 or 7 years old or so, I started taking ballet classes at this one dance studio nearby, I've always loved dancing, and I really enjoyed taking classes there. At some point I learned that the studio did a production of the ballet The Nutcracker every year around Christmas. My favorite part of dancing was getting to perform onstage, so I signed up.
I kinda hoped I'd get the part of Clara, the lead role, but since it was my first time in the show, of course I didn't. But nonetheless, I had a great time and decided to do it again the next year. When the next year came around, I again hoped I'd get picked to be Clara. It still didn't happen. Of course, I was only one in a fairly large crowd of young dancers wanting that special opportunity so it's not really that surprising that I didn't get the part. The next year I tried again. I still didn't get it. But I kept wishing I would.
It wasn't that I wanted to be Clara simply because it was the main role, I wanted it because it meant something deeper to me. The story of The Nutcracker has always seemed magical to me somehow. Even now it's still is a big part of who I am. I wanted to be a bigger part of that magic and be able to bring it to other people.
I don't think the reason I didn't get the role was due to any lack of skill. I don't mean to boast, but I was one of the better dancers of my age group and level. However, the studio tended to cast shorter people as Clara so they'd look more like a younger girl. I've always been on the tall side. I'd hate to think my height was the only thing keeping me out of the role, and it probably wasn't the only reason, but I know it was a key factor.
Then, as time went on, I began to realize that I wasn't enjoying dancing at the studio as much as I did when I'd first joined. The classes were tedious, my favorite teachers were no longer available, and I was getting older and taller and the chance of getting the part of Clara became smaller each year. I decided to quit ballet. At first it was a relief not to have to drag myself out the door three times a week for something I didn't enjoy, but I still missed it.
As the years went by there was a while when I didn't really think about it that much, but then I began realizing just how much I did wish I could go back and pick up where I left off. But by then it was too late. I'd already lost a lot of my skill from not dancing for a few years, too much to be able to drop back in where I'd left. It was terrible realizing I couldn't just go right back to where I was. When I'd quit before I'd never intended to quit permanently, I just thought I'd take a year, maybe two, to catch my breath before continuing on. But then one year had turned to two, then three, then four or five. Now I couldn't believe I probably let any chance of returning to the life I'd known for years slip out the window.
These days I still haven't yet found a way to get back the life I left behind. But every year at Christmastime I remember it all. The joy I felt when I first started dancing at that studio and when I stepped onstage, even just in the background, to perform for the audience and be a part of something bigger. The pain of losing it all in a decision made to help myself recover from being stressed out that then resulted in shutting a door I'd meant to leave open before I'd even realized it. It adds a bittersweet tinge to the otherwise cheerful Christmas festivities. Because even after all these years, the one thing I want most for Christmas, more than any of the presents under the tree, is a chance to do the one thing I'd always wanted to do, the one thing I never got to do - a chance to perform as Clara in The Nutcracker.
I try not to think about it all too hard. Because I know if I do I will inevitably arrive at the conclusion that there's no way for this dream to come true. It's been years since I actually danced ballet and while many of the dance teachers know and remember be well, they aren't just going to hand me the role, especially with my rusty skills. But even so, I keep wishing for it to happen. Hoping that one day one of these years I just might be able to step back into the spotlight and experience the magic I've dreamed about my whole life. Because even after all this time I still love dancing and want to go back to that dance studio and wish I could have a chance - just one chance - to get to be Clara.
for some reason I cry every time I hear this song ;-;
Anyhow so yeah... long story short all I want for Christmas is a chance to get to perform as Clara in The Nutcracker. Which will probably never happen despite my constant hoping and wishing that it will. The skin is of me wearing the costume I'd like to get to wear if I somehow ever did get to dance as Clara.
So yeah, I hope you like it even though it's really simple compared to my usual skins.
Pls leave a diamond/favorite if you like and subscribe for more! And as always, honest feedback is welcome and appreciated.
Gender | Female |
Format | Java |
Model | Alex |
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my friend was in the nutcracker in 2016 and even though she didn't get the role she wanted, she kept on trying! She still dances till' this day <3
plus your skin omg I'm in love <33
(shortest motivational speech up there ever btw)
lol
I don't really expect to win this (although it would be nice if I did XD) but hopefully I'll get finalists.