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-The Teacher- [Horror Story]

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starcatcher77's Avatar starcatcher77
Level 16 : Journeyman Architect
15
=============Disclaimer=============
A short disclaimer before we start. This story is
intended to frighten the reader.
Viewer discretion advised.
=============The Story=============
I was sitting in my room, doing my online math class.
My teacher contently looked at me through the webcam,
as I did my fractions. All was well until my teacher yelled
a blood curdling scream, suprised I asked if my teacher
was okay. When she looked up her pupils were abscent,
the whites of her eyes glistening behind her glasses.
She screamed once again, that terrifying scream. Blood
poured from her eye sockets, covering her face in a glistening
red coat. She leapt at the screen screaming once more, we were cut-off, static.
Disturbed by this sight I ran down stairs and told my parents what had happened.
They shrugged it off as another one of my pranks, but this time is was real.
Scared out of my wits I ate my dinner, with a fair amount of coaxing I agreed to
go to bed. I dreamed of terrifying occurances, including the text "You can't hide"
passing through my mind. I shook and trembled in bed, suddenly jolting upwards.
I couldn't move, my teacher hanging over me with the same terrifying appearance as our last meetinh.
She said "Your family will mourn upon the sight of your mangled corpse lying in bed, lifeless."
Before I could scream, she brought down a butcher knife on my chest. Knowing this was my last
breath. I prayed, hoping I would come to the foot of heaven's gate.

The End
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1
04/10/2015 7:30 pm
Level 37 : Artisan Scribe
LetsGoTrippin
LetsGoTrippin's Avatar
If there's somethin' strange,

In yo neighborhood (or in this instance, school),

Who ya gonna call?
1
02/23/2015 10:51 pm
Level 11 : Journeyman Scribe
Camarilla
Camarilla's Avatar
To be fair, I don't think that this is really a creepypasta. I'm no expert (you can see by the 'Level 1' below my username), but while I was reading this I wasn't scared at all. There's no connection, no storyline, no running gag that will come back to haunt the reader in the end. You jump from one thought to the next. Was it your fault the teacher's eyes suddenly began gushing blood? Is there a curse that's been haunting you both for a while? The teacher just kills you, with no explanation whatsoever. It's like you took three or four ideas and pressed them together into one, creating a Frankenstein-Blog.

There's no doubt, though, that it took a lot of thought to make the original Frankenstein, and although your ideas are blurry, I found that you were concise and yet detailed. Each one of your ideas, separately, would've made a fantastic story. Yours has the skill to be one; might just want to consider refining it a bit.
1
02/24/2015 9:03 am
Level 16 : Journeyman Architect
starcatcher77
starcatcher77's Avatar
thanks for the feedback. Technically It already isn't a creepy pasta because no one has copied over the internet.
Its actually a horror story. I'll keep what you said in mind.
1
02/18/2015 6:05 pm
Level 28 : Expert Miner
randomteddys500
randomteddys500's Avatar
HOLY S**T THAT IS FREAKY but i love it
1
02/17/2015 12:40 pm
Level 29 : Expert Ninja
Gobul
Gobul's Avatar
This is really spooky, a bit short though
1
02/17/2015 1:49 pm
Level 16 : Journeyman Architect
starcatcher77
starcatcher77's Avatar
Thanks! I'm starting small so it's pretty short.
1
02/16/2015 5:31 pm
Level 16 : Journeyman Architect
starcatcher77
starcatcher77's Avatar
No comments? I'd like some constructive critism
1
02/16/2015 3:26 pm
Level 16 : Journeyman Architect
starcatcher77
starcatcher77's Avatar
Tell me if you would like more of this type of content!
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