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Echos - Self Awareness
By, K.M. Flowers
It burdens me to think that others view me as a "monster". It stings and stabs at my chest like a sword in battle. Self awareness is one of many enemies we face, but for me, it's one of few.
I bleed tears of anger and guilt thinking that I come off or could be this "monster" everyone thinks I am. It burns into my soul knowing how much I try to be someone who others thinks is false.
I'm afraid of being lost in this ocean of lies made up by other's words and the self conscious mind I have. I've tried to change how I look, tried to change how I act, how I walk, how I talk... Silence does nothing but draw more of these lies and people don't seem to realize how much it kills me knowing that I'm failing at being what I want to be so badly... How can I accept something that others do not see?
How can I accept what I want to be but cannot see?
I see a broken child sitting in the dark, chained to oblivion with his head hung low.
I see darkness for miles subtly consuming the emptiness around him, and hear nothing but the roaring sound of silence as it festers.
I'm not perfect and I'm not alright... I lie to myself to hide how I feel, I lie to myself to sleep at night knowing how much that child I once was is hurting.
| Credit | To all those who hurt like I. |
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