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Yo Mamma Jokes!!!!

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Kaidynbarton's Avatar Kaidynbarton
Level 24 : Expert Toast
18
Hey guys, Kaid here and im going to post several jokes below [YO MAMMA JOKES!!] Please post any other good ones which you know which will give other members a good laugh.

If there are any repeats please let me know via PM!


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1.Yo mamma's so grouchy, the mcdonalds she works in doesnt even server happy meals.

2.Yo mamma's so ugly, people at the circus pay money NOT to see her.

3.Yo mamma's so fat, she puts on her lipstick with a paint roller.

4.Yo mamma's so fat, when she steps on a scale it reads 'one at a time please'.

5.Yo mamma's so poor, when I saw her kicking a can down the street, I asked her what she was doing and she said "Moving."


6.Yo mamma's so short, you can see her feet on her drivers license!
7.Yo mamma's so ugly, Bob the Builder looked at her and said "I CAN'T FIX THAT!

8.Yo mamma's so ugly, she looks like she fell off the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down.

9.Yo mamma's so old, her birth certificate is in Roman numerals.

10.Yo mamma's breath smells so bad when she yawns her teeth duck.

11.Yo mamma's so fat that when she goes to the beach the whales start singing ' WE ARE FAMILY! '

12.Yo mamma's so fat that when she goes to the beach everyone thinks shes the Titanic.{Suggested by Thunderpants44}

13.Yo mamma's so fat that when she goes to the cinemas she sits next to everyone!{Suggested by prettywaters}

14.Yo mamma's so fat, she bought cheats for WII FIT.{Suggested by AussieBaybeXD}

15.Yo mamma's so hairy, that at the zoo all of the people run away and the animal control is called!{Suggested by McGrizzz}

16.Yo mamma's so stupid, at my party i yelled 'Drinks Are On The House!' and then she went home and a got ladder.{Suggested by FarGuardian}

17.Yo mamma's so short, when she crosses the road people think she's a chicken!{Suggested by Thunderpants44}

18.Yo mamma's so fat that even Dora can't explore her.{Suggested by bopart}

19.Yo mamma's is so ugly that when she entered the 'ugly' contest they said "Sorry no professionals allowed"{Suggested by sparlac}

20.Yo mamma's so fat that when she walked passed the TV I missed a 3 hour special!!{Suggested by terreen}

21.Yo mamma's so fat that I took a picture of her last Christmas and it's still printing. :D{Suggested by 8391ice}

22.Yo mamma's so stupid that she tried to climb mountain dew!!{Suggested by XoXoAwesome}

23.Yo mamma's so fat that when she goes to the beach the whales say "WOW"{Suggested by PandaPie52402}

24.Yo mamma's so fat that she is sponsored by Mcdonalds.{Suggested by Luthery}

25.Yo mamma's so small that you have to zoom in 600 times to see her on a picture.{Suggested by Luthery}

26.Yo mamma's so fat that there's no light anymore.{Suggested by Luthery}

27.Yo mamma's so stupid that she tried getting kids with protection.{Suggested by Luthery}

28.Yo mamma's so ugly that the earth moves away from her.{Suggested by Luthery}

29.Yo mamma's teeth are so yellow that when she yawned she knocked the sun out of business!{Suggested by sergeant-miner}

30.Yo mamma's so fat and scary that when she jumped in the water, the water jumped out.{Suggested by sergeant-miner}

31.Yo Mamma's so fat that when we were playing hide 'n' seek i found her big ass butt sticking out of a mountain!{Suggested by zakrobo1}

32.Yo mamma's so ugly that she made Nanny Mcfee cry.{Suggested by pipalo}

33.Yo mamma's so stupid that she threw a rock at the ground and missed.{Suggested by mathy353}

34.Yo mamma's so dumb that she returned a puzzle to the store and said it was broken.{Suggested by cobra_fett}

35.Yo mamma's so fat that when she stepped on the scale she saw her phone number!!{Suggested by cobra fett}

36.Yo mamma's so fat that they had to rename space!!{Suggested by Creepah_BOOM71}

37.Yo mamma's so fat that she acted as the moon.{Suggested by Creepah_BOOM71}

38.Yo mamma's so round that the moon said "I can't compete with that!"{Suggested by Creepah_BOOM71}

39.Yo mamma's so fat that when she went to the market the people asked her if she was rich ( because she's so fat and eats a lot?){Suggested by Creepah_BOOM71}

40.Yo mamma's so fat that when she jumped off a 2 km cliff and she only fell 2cm.{Suggested by Creepah_BOOM71}

41.Yo mamma's so ugly that when she looked in the mirror and asked it "Mirror, Mirror on the wall who is the prettiest of them all" the mirror said "Well definitely not you!!"{Suggested by Creepah_BOOM71}

42.Yo mamma's so greasy that she doesn't walk, she slides.{Suggested by darkminer576}

43.Yo mamma's so dumb that she took a spoon to the Superbowl.{Suggested by darkminer576}

44.Yo mamma's so dumb that she sold her car for gas money.{Suggested by darkminer576}

45.Yo mamma's so fat that she jumped in the ocean and the whales started singing "We are family, even though your fatter than me!!"{Suggested by darkminer576}

46.Yo mamma's so fat that NASA had to send a satellite around her twice!{Suggested by darkminer576}

47.Yo mamma's so fat that she has her own area code!!{Suggested by darkminer576}

48.Yo mamma's so fat that she got stuck in the Grand Canyon!{Suggested by Tryplex}

49.Yo mamma's so poor that i saw her yesterday wrestling a squirrel for a peanut!!

50.Yo mamma's so ugly that she turned Medusa to stone!

51.Yo mamma's so ugly that she could make an onion cry!

52.Yo mamma's so fat that the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is the width of the door!

53.Yo mamma's so dumb that she cant even pass a drunk test when she isn't even drunk!

54.Yo mamma's so dumb that she tried to commit suicide by jumping out of the basement window!

55.Yo mamma's so stupid that she stopped at a stop sign and waited for it to say go!

56.Yo mamma's so ugly that not even Photoshop could help her!{Suggested by crazyguy619}

57.Yo mamma's so fat that she broke the stairway to heaven!{Suggested by kidalaxus}

58.Yo mamma's so ugly that hello kitty said "goodbye!"{Suggested by kidalaxus}

59.Yo mamma's so fat that everytime she turns around its her birthday!{Suggested by kidalaxus}

60.Yo mamma's so stupid that she got hit by a parked car!{Suggested by kidalaxus}

61.Yo mamma's so fat that when someone killed her in COD, they got a 5 person kill streak!{Suggested by kidalaxus}

62.Yo mamma's so ugly that she gives Freddy Kruger nightmares!{Suggested by kidalaxus}

63.Yo mamma's so fat that she had to be baptized at Seaworld!{Suggested by kidalaxus}

64.Yo mamma's so fat that when ever she wheres high-eels she strikes oil!

65.Yo mamma's so poor that i stepped through her front door and fell out the back!

66.Yo mamma's so ugly that not even Photoshop could help her!{Suggested by crazyguy619}

67.Yo mamma's so fat that when she came into town S.W.A.T thought there was a MONSTER!{Suggested by airpline1}

68.Yo mamma's so fat that Jesus couldn't even lift up her spirit!{Suggested by Spongemon}

69.Yo mamma's so fat that when she went skydiving she didn't need a parachute!{Suggested by hornetsboy21}

70.Yo mamma's so stupid she said "Move it!" to a parked car!{Suggested by skystream5}

71.Yo mamma's so fat that if she was the Titanic, the iceberg would sink!{Suggested by skystream5}

72.Yo mamma's so fat that she ate Jenny AND Craig!{Suggested by Alpha970}

73.Yo mamma's so hairy that when she lifted up her armpits, Bob Marley came out!{Suggested by mrmax23}

74.
Yo mamma's so poor that when she goes to KFC she has to lick other people's fingers!{Suggested by TRONMinecraft}

75.
Yo mamma's so fat that when she wore a yellow dress people had mistaken her for a bus!{Suggested by Crunkoon}

76.
Yo mamma's so fat that she sinks like a rock in the Dead Sea!{Suggested by Jivusa}

77.Yo mamma's so fat that it wasn't an iceberg that sunk the Titanic!{Suggested by Lolisher95}

78.Yo mamma's so fat that she had to take a picture via satellite!{Suggested by Lolisher95}

79.Yo mamma's so fat that she sits around the house, LITERALLY around the house!{Suggested by Lolisher95}

80.
Yo mamma's so poor that when she walked down the street i asked her "Did you loose a shoe?" she says "No, I found one!"{Suggested by mighty2361 AND SirCheese543207}

81.
Yo mamma's so old that she autographed a copy of the Bible.{Suggested by The Micro Freak}

82.
Yo mamma's so old that she was around when the Dead Sea was only sick!{Suggested by The Micro Freak}

83.
Yo mamma's so stupid it took her an hour and a half to watch 60 minutes.{Suggested by The Micro Freak}

84.
Yo mamma's so fat that she can only go DOWN in an elevator!{Suggested by riskyarmy}

85.
Yo mamma's so fat that she uses the equator for a belt!{Suggested by mighty2361}

86.Yo mamma's so fat that when she wants to shake someones hand she has to give directions!

87.Yo mamma's so ugly that her pillow cries at night!

88.Yo mamma's so big that she whistles bass!

89.Yo mamma's so stupid that she got locked in a grocery store and starved!

90.Yo mamma's so fat that when she bungee jumps, she brings the bridge down as well!

91.Yo mamma's head is so big that is shows up on the radar!

92.Yo mamma's so fat that she has to use a boomerang to put her belt on!

93.Yo mamma's so fat that when i drove around her i ran out of petrol!

94.Yo mamma's so ugly that when i took her to the beautician it took 12 hours ... just to get a quote!

95.Yo mamma's head is so empty when you stand next to her you hear the ocean!


Hope you guys like these jokes and as i said before post some of your own and they will be published in here.


Just remember that Comments, Diamonds, Favourites and Subscribes are MUCH appreciated.

-Kaid ~~
CreditThanks to everyones support and funny Yo mamma jokes :)
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17 Update Logs

Update #17 : by Kaidynbarton 10/30/2012 12:21:17 amOct 30th, 2012

Added lots more jokes
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Herobrinebuster
09/04/2014 10:27 am
Level 11 : Journeyman Mage
Herobrinebuster's Avatar
Yo mama so fat, when somebody told me to picture her in my head, she broke my neck!
1
dragonhunter4213
06/19/2013 8:14 am
Level 6 : Apprentice Miner
dragonhunter4213's Avatar
yo mamma's so stupid she got blown up by a creeper in peaceful mode!
1
cowsarecoola
03/06/2013 6:12 pm
Level 1 : New Crafter
cowsarecoola's Avatar
can you post mine please
1
cowsarecoola
03/06/2013 6:10 pm
Level 1 : New Crafter
cowsarecoola's Avatar
Yo mamas so stupid she thought taco bell was a Mexican telephone company
1
PvPpro
12/15/2012 8:41 am
Level 2 : Apprentice Miner
PvPpro's Avatar
Yo mamma's so fat she has her own ozone layer!!!!!
1
tearstreak
12/13/2012 7:15 pm
Level 6 : Apprentice Miner
tearstreak's Avatar
ooh ooh ive got a good one!, im not sure if its there or not but

" Yo mama so fat when she puts on high heels ,she strikes oil!

also a good one; "Yo mama so fat when she saw a bus full of white kids she said "someone chase that twinkie!"

realy good blog dude
1
cowsarecoola
03/06/2013 6:13 pm
Level 1 : New Crafter
cowsarecoola's Avatar
Yo mama so fat when she puts on high heels ,she strikes oil! is already on ther
But i love the one about the twinkie
1
riskyarmy
11/09/2012 12:04 pm
Level 5 : Apprentice Explorer
riskyarmy's Avatar
PS: I noticed on your "funny jokes" column it has a yo mamma's glasses are so think joke I know it may not be proper but its a yo mamma joke why not publich it????
1
riskyarmy
11/09/2012 11:59 am
Level 5 : Apprentice Explorer
riskyarmy's Avatar
Yo mamma's so fat that she has her own orbit!

Yo mamma's so dumb that she had to walk out side and look up to make sure it was sunday!
1
ShadowHunterDX5
11/08/2012 7:50 pm
Level 9 : Apprentice Warrior
ShadowHunterDX5's Avatar
yo mammas so stupid she puts a bag on the tv and calls it paper view
1
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