Hey there. You may have seen me in the pmc chat before, advertising my amazing works with witty lines that fail to attract attention. So I decided that I would share these horrible lines with you, the pmc community! Use them at will, just tell people where they came from if you are inquired. Any place where I say _____ just replace it with blog/project/story/skin/genitalia.

My _____ needs a constant supply of diamonds to live.

My _____ is floating away. Quick, weigh it down with diamonds!

I forgot to buy an anniversary gift for my _____. Does anyone have any diamonds they can spare?

Help, my _____ is on the loose and trying to eat me. Sate is hunger with diamonds!

Your hands seem to be full of diamonds. Here, dump them on my _____.

What happens when you cross my _____ with diamonds. I dunno, lets find out.

Dear giddly god gosh, I made a super epic _____. I daresay this deserves a diamond!

5 bucks for anyone who gives my _____ a diamond.

Give my _____ a diamond or I'll smear your brains on the floor with a minigun.

Hey you. Yea, you. With the diamonds. My _____ wants those diamonds.

I need one more diamond to make a diamond pickaxe. Would anyone be willing to donate a diamond? Anyone?

My _____ lost all its diamonds. Why did it loose all its diamonds? I dunno. Blame Paril.

You have diamonds and my _____ doesn't. Can you spot what's wrong with this picture?

My _____ has lost his home. You can help him get it back by giving him diamonds! Submitted by XoXoAwesome

Ninjas stole mai kittez, need diamondz for karate lessons. Submitted by RedJohnxS

Odd. I lost my diamonds. Can I borrow yours for an eternity? Submitted by Moo2wo

Thatssss a nice diamond you have there. It'd be a shame if you didn't give it to me... Submitted by Treme10

Diamonds are useless. You don't need them. Give them to my _____ instead. Submitted by Peels9765

My _____ is now a creeper! Shove diamonds in its mouth to stop it from hissing! Submitted by jetfrog28

I'll stop killing babies if you give me a diamond. Submitted by Squidfather

Hey! May I borrow some of your diamonds? I haven't had any for such a long time :( Submitted by tanhuynh226

My _____ needs diamond ammo for his cannon. Anyone willing to donate?

My _____ is angry with me because I didn't get it a good enough birthday present. Help me pay for a new one with diamonds. Submitted by Bellaabzug21

Hey you! Give me your diamonds, NOW. Submitted by Fighterragon

Hello ladies. Look at your diamonds. Now look at my _____. Now back at your diamonds. Now back at my _____. My _____ could have your diamonds. But it doesn't. And if you stopped holding them, my _____ could have your diamonds. Look at my hands, its a chest with tickets to that thing you want to go to. Anything is possible with diamonds. I'm on a pig. Submitted by Kerrtastic

Government took my house, starving and broke, please give diamonds...God Bless. Submitted by korigon

If any of you have a clever and witty diamond pickup line, then post it in the comments below, and I'll be sure to grant you credit.

But of course, I can't do that without a few shiny diamonds first.....