🏳️⚧️ Life Update: I'm Trans & Struggling SEVERE GENDER DYSPHORIA
I’ve been quietly dealing with gender dysphoria, autism, and depression for years while creating solo Minecraft projects like Lazulilopolis.
My egg cracked in tears the night before Pride Month. I’m transgender. I live with disabilities and struggle daily in a one-bedroom apartment in the Bay Area with my parents.
I don’t have a donation page set up yet, but I truly need support — financially and emotionally. If you want to help, message me here.
I’m working on setting up something like Ko-fi soon. Thank you for seeing me.
You know I can not handle followers as I learned content creation wasn't for me. As an autistic with OCD, I take very single word and comment very seriously. I felt like I had to please my followers as I was just seeking for validation. I wanted to keep my follower count and clout but I can not take it much longer.
After I delete my account, I will fix up my life for the greater good. I wanna live real life. Social Media/Blogs ain't life for me.
THANK YOU ALL FOR POSITIVE FEEDBACK, DIAMONDS, LOVE, PRAISE I HOPE YOU CAN LIVE LIFE WITHOUT ME
Wow.... This is insanely relatable. I came back here after months of playing in your city with my daughter. We are both ASD. I am OCD as well. I was a pretty known modder for other games before. I disappeared....well, firstly because I became a mother... But I didn't come back for similar reasons. I hung on to every word from my supporters, haters, and everyone else... and it broke me little by little. Now I'm scared of commenting on posts or publishing my own passions or anything - for fear of rejection, yes...but honestly... it's more for fear of regaining a following. And feeling like I need to spend every waking moment completing mods or other work because it's what my followers wanted. I had no idea there were others like me out there... I'm 34 years old and struggle with it every day. I don't know you. You don't know me. But if you ever want to rage about stuff like this, look me up sometime. Gearhog, gearh0g, or fb.com/narcinsom. I'm not hard to find if you're looking, lol.
I wish you the best of luck! And good for you! Oh yeah I came here to tell you how much we enjoy your city. It's the only map I've found that doesn't drive my OCD insane forcing me to fix every tiny thing. I guess it makes sense now, hahaha... And my 4 year old ASD daughter adores it. She explores all the houses and buildings and spawns a million animals in every single one. I've had to restart so many times but we always go back to YOUR map. I like to build. But... I realized that I don't need to with your map. Its so detailed yet without all those crazy distractions or unnecessary parts so many MC builders are so very fond of. I'll be sad to see you go, but glad you're doing it to better yourself. I just wanted you to know how special that one map is to my daughter and I. I have backups saved on every hard drive and device we own because we never want to lose it. Maybe that's silly... But it means a lot to us.
Anyways... Rambling, sorry. Thank you and good luck!
Maybe I may keep account. I was just very overwhelmed by my own creations and profile as I wanted to build my way. I felt like I had to follow a certain standard and meet you followers expectations and please y'all.
I wanted to detox Social Media from my life as I want to live my life in the real world offline.
CYPREZZ DO NOT DELETE MY ACCOUNT, I WANNA KEEP IT PRETTY PLEASE
aw man, its okay, life can seem like that but in reality you might be the one holding yourself back. I have autism too and trust me its hard, but you needn't punish yourself for anything. You're doing just fine.
I agree with ScotsMiser. I think when doing very large projects, its best to start with sketching–though it also works wonders for smaller builds. When I was recreating Copenhagen Central Station with DreamWanderer, it was way too big for a normal "build one part and finish it, then move on" – instead we opted to sketch out everything in large shapes with wool, and just placed signs everywhere to indicate what everything was supposed to be.
Then from there, we had a completed sketch, and were able to see the end goal from the very beginning, preventing us from hitting the wall of "it never ends". So thats also another point actually: Have an end goal and dont add to set end goal. Sketch out the end goal, and don't add more to the end goal. Obiously adjustments are more than welcome but if the first endgoal was to build a small city with a port – then don't start adding a second city or an industrial area that wasn't part of the original goal
One oft discussed concept: Do a very rough paper sketch (just things like districts, large parks, and main drags) then work on a small[ish] contained area (like a park and it's surrounding buildings)
Sup people. I tend to be a lot less active on PMC nowadays. Is because I more active on Discord! I be chatting over on servers like PMC and Cities Skylines and more.
I was getting into modded Minecraft with Create and such. Learning new things gets very fun meanwhile quite stressful at the same time. I checked out Iskall's Vault-Hunters series and that looked like my kind of mod-pack. Exploring is what really got me into Minecraft! As much the builder that you known me for, I really like exploring and adventures!
Lazulilopolis - Lazuli CityEnvironment / Landscaping Map
