I had a dream where I was harry potter’s personal assistant ghost (none of the other people could see me) and I just kept going around yelling alohamora to open doors for him

PMC social credit system when

Umbrellas are just scams made up by umbrella companies to sell more umbrellas

That's nice work there! 👀

every single other PMC member is actually just one of my alts. you are the only real member.

I just witnessed one of those google assistant things say “if you have feedback please say ‘ok google I have feedback’” but when it said ”ok google”, it triggered itself and tried to reply to itself

idk if this is just me but I really hate how low pitched my voice is (to the point where I actively try to talk in a higher pitched voice)

despite it literally being considered high pitched by my friends (it’s higher pitched than like 50% of other people my age)

the best idea I’ve ever had is for an unboxing channel, but the stuff that gets unboxed is absolutely stupid

so for example, it could range from “unboxing walmart vine tomatoes” to “unboxing a lightbulb” to “unboxing AA batteries” all the way to “unboxing a front door”

and all the videos would be unnecessarily long and detailed, with them commenting on every tiny thing

not me trolling my german friends by using an automatic discord german translator plugin

and then forgetting to turn it off when I reply to a message from Cyprezz

💀💀💀

fun analytics update trivia: my analytics are better than yours

no context pmc chat

amogus

me bored in maths so me and the person sitting next to me end up playing the game on a whiteboard where we create fake countries and go to war

i won by developing a nationwide monorail network to increase my country’s happiness, offering pizza vouchers to university students in return for free scholarships, and then using the university students to build a particle accelerator, of which the energy from that is used to create an infinite pizza voucher machine, which I use to bargain with neighbouring countries to breed really cute dogs to deter the enemy from attacking

me: gives someone irl my contact info
them: sends me a friend request
me: gets home
me: sees new friend request
me: denies because I don’t recognise it

who else does this

your eyes are like a breath of rain

O.O wow

do y’all have that one person on your sidebar who has 91827 unread posts whenever you log in

Cyprezz petition for mods to have an uwufy button on wall posts which will put the post through an uwu filter so we can use it when someone says something political

you've done enough for us, young one.

wake up.